tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34245836984092227642024-02-21T13:13:52.136-05:00Our Family's JourneyBlessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.
Psalm 84:5The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-11562938346746651882015-01-08T14:34:00.002-05:002015-01-08T18:46:47.359-05:00A Sinner Rejoices in the goodness of her GodWOW! It has been a LONG time since I have written a blog! I chose to write today because of how grateful I am to my wonderful God! I hesitated to even name the post "A Sinner Rejoices in the goodness of her God" because I do not want to give the wrong impression that God is only good because I have something "good" to share. I will preface the fact that before I knew what I am about to tell, I was already feeling very grateful for my God and His goodness even in the midst of a very difficult time. I will be honest...much of my life has felt like a wrestling match between me & the Lord. I realize more than ever how much pride I have and why the wrestling match takes so long! If only I could "submit" sooner, and just lay myself down and say, "OK God, you win!" But I already know He wins. I am not wrestling because I want to win-to beat God so to speak. I wrestle because the only way to truly have victory is to understand the depths of my sin - the root of where each sinful act comes from. Only when I am broken over my sin, is there true lasting change. And that is why I wrestle. To be broken. I often times ask the Lord to break me quickly. But He doesn't. I typically don't stand up from my knees in prayer before the Lord saying, "Oh, NOW i see it! I see my sin!" More often, after praying for a broken and contrite heart, the Lord leads me into more circumstances that exposes my sin. He turns the heat up and more ugliness comes out. At the height of my anger, bitterness, resentment, etc. is where I feel broken. In those moments, I hate what I have become, and fall on my face before the Lord in repentance and gratitude for what His sacrifice on the cross accomplished for me. Without His grace, I would be a slave to that sin. That alone, is why the post, "A Sinner rejoices in the goodness of her God"<br />
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The past few weeks have been quite a wrestling match for me. I tend to be a pretty upbeat person, not often having down days. I am stubborn by nature. And that stubbornness refuses to allow any earthly thing to rob my joy. But there are a few things/people that are able to do that better than others. A few years ago, I wrote a blog post about this.......You can read it <a href="http://cookefamilyjourney.blogspot.com/2010/06/who-or-what-is-your-donkey-share.html">HERE</a>. This magnificent child of mine continues to challenge this often times "not ready for debate mode" mama. He is smart! I am not. He is extremely intelligent! (I AM better at math than he is!) : )Just figured I'd throw myself a bone here! Honestly, God has gifted him with a mind that often times blows me away. He is very black and white, and because of that thinking, it is hard to convince him of anything once he's made up his mind. If you know him, you know what I mean! When it comes to spiritual things, it is not always black and white. Don't' get me wrong, doctrine often is. But that is another post for another day. My struggle has always been trying to get my son to understand "The bigger picture" of life. He tends to focus on politics and all the ways that our government is messed up. I agree for the most part....I just can't get caught up in always talking about it in every situation, lest we lose that bigger picture of the gospel....that there is a lost world who needs Jesus. I don't want the gospel of Christ to ever get lost in our fight against a faulty government, or being right about ANY topic, as noble as it may seem. I have found myself in many situations that I have had to back down from discussing or fighting, at the risk of losing righteousness in order to achieve it. There is a place to stand on these things, and I believe the Lord has gifted my son to perhaps fight for some of them, but hopefully never at the risk of his holy calling.<br />
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It is funny I should sound so noble in saying that I have had to back down in conversations - because I am able to do that with any other person EXCEPT for him! He is relentless on his points.....and so I am I. Lord help us both! Well, today, I received a phone call from my sister in Florida(My son is staying with her for a week during his college break) to share with me how proud I would be of my son. They were at my nephew's Tae Kwon Do class today where David was interacting with an apparently very intellectual 7 year old. This boy comes from a strong Christian family and is homeschooled. My son began a conversation with the boy while his mom shared with my sister how her heart aches over the fact that her son does not believe in God. (How can one believe in something you cannot see-pretty black and white, right?) This mom saw the intellectual conversation her son was having with my son and wondered if David would be willing to talk to this boy about God. At the time of this phone call my son was in a room with this 7 yo boy talking to him about the Lord. <br />
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I have no update to report as of yet, but I was very proud. Even more, I am humbled. I have allowed my own anger, control, bitterness, etc. etc. to continue to get in the way of what God is wanting to teach me all along. I love when God throws me these bones along the way. Not so I can be proud in a sinful way, but humbled in knowing that that God is still on the throne and He alone can open blind eyes to see. Maybe one day I will write a book of the details of that truth in my own life, but this is only a blog (on the verge of a book already!) I worried that in any given moment, my son may lose sight of "The bigger picture". But today, he did not. This may not sound like anything miraculous to anyone reading, but my heart rejoices in my God. And again, not because there is a praise to report, but because I see the magnitude of God's grace over my own sin. I worry about things I cannot control. I get angry about things that only God can change. I have wrestled over many things this past month. Heart issues are being exposed at a rate I often cannot handle. I am thankful though, because these are the things that cause me to rise early in the morning and get on my face before the Lord and beg upon His mercies to change me....to break me....to fill me with His Spirit. When I arise from those prayers, I often don't receive the answers I think I need, but I receive an intimacy that cannot be explained. My desperate need for the Lord is necessary to walk in His Spirit. I continue to wrestle. It is not easy. But there is gratitude and joy.<br />
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If the mom of this young boy could read this blog I would tell her (like I would tell anyone else struggling in life over ANY matter), that this trial you are going through is more about you than it is your situation. It is for OUR sanctification. Everything we go through is for the purpose of bringing glory and honor to our great God. God does not get glory from my life when I am full of myself. So He brings me through the fire and brings the dross to the surface.He does this in order that I may fall desperately upon His grace to change me and wrestle it out until He does. As long as there is anger, worry, fear, etc. I know I have to get back in the ring. Thank you precious Lord for your faithfulness to me. I am thankful for your mercy and grace!The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-14990005032503684102012-01-14T17:50:00.002-05:002012-01-14T17:56:23.794-05:00Get organized<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicLQVr9Y9GftFkGiKuTUCFxYM5fURDkiC-sZ6h2AgKw1qjh3deKL3E7J1ktT1pu7tzuD1vlznJFOUHzVtV2cLTiESu7NJJLHa61lS7AYQeDMptMGlPWdCEYpIPC0fFGhDqaqltRBIaYZc/s1600/Get-Organized1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 124px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicLQVr9Y9GftFkGiKuTUCFxYM5fURDkiC-sZ6h2AgKw1qjh3deKL3E7J1ktT1pu7tzuD1vlznJFOUHzVtV2cLTiESu7NJJLHa61lS7AYQeDMptMGlPWdCEYpIPC0fFGhDqaqltRBIaYZc/s200/Get-Organized1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5697625350411688578" /></a><br />My friend directed me to this blog to help me with my food budget. I stumbled upon this opportunity to enter to win a $100 gift card from Wal-Mart! By posting on my blog, I get to enter the contest. This would certainly help my food budget! I would encourage you to join as well, but that may limit my options of winning! JK! : ) Join! It's easy! (I think.....we'll see if this works!)<br /><br />http://thepeacefulmom.com/2012/01/02/get-organized-100-walmart-gift-card-give-away/comment-page-12/#comment-9733The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-90906435170844743712010-06-10T09:06:00.002-04:002010-06-10T09:10:25.220-04:00Who (or what ) is your donkey?Has God put a person or a circumstance in your life that seems to frustrate you often? I don't mean to make this sound bad, but it may. No matter how hard I try not to show my sinful self, it will come out anyway, so I might as well be honest & put it out there.<br /><br />When my oldest son was 20 months old, he was diagnosed with autism.(more accurately Aspergers Syndrome). That year began a very different path in my life than I ever expected or wanted to be on. I wanted so badly to help him learn to talk, to understand, to be as normal as possible. I worked day and night with him to teach him things that would come naturally to typically developing children. Although I knew of the disability my son had, it did not stop me from getting frustrated and often times angry with him. As he got older, he progressed tremendously and I was thankful for that. God taught me A LOT about myself in those early years. However, with age and progression, his vocabulary became quite advanced, and each day of my life I feel I am on trial and my son is the judge. I am NOT impressed with feeling like I am on trial. So needless to say, when i am in this position, I feel angry. I get angry. I think sometimes the neighbors know it too. I am not pleased with myself but often times feel out of control. I feel the guilt afterward and know I was not practicing self control and therefore leave NO room for the Holy Spirit's power to fill me if I am full of myself at that moment.<br /><br />I could write a book about this topic but I won't. : ) But I did want to share what the Lord showed me this week through His Word. Typically when things are difficult, I will ask the Lord to reveal to me what He wants me to see in the situation. I know He ALWAYS has something for me to learn, whether I am the one in sin, or someone has sinned against me. The bottom line is, I will not be perfect until I meet Him in glory, so I KNOW He uses every circumstance in my life to draw out my sin and refine me. I will always look for that hidden sin in my own heart.<br /><br />This week as I was praying about the situation with my son (we had another huge blowup) : ( I rehearsed in my mind of how much I sacrifice for my boys. i thought of what MY desires would be for myself if I wasn't homeschooling and felt I give so much. (I was in self pity mode so give some grace here) : ) I would compare myself to others and see how much more consistent I am in discipline and THEIR kids don't act this way! I felt resentment because my oldest takes so much out of me and I feel I often times give leftovers to the other two. it was not a good day for me. I want to be honest here, so bear with me. My most sinful nature comes out with this boy and i do NOT like what I see when it comes out. The strange part is that because of this child, God has given me a tremendous love and appreciate for what Christ did on the cross because I see tangibly the disgusting nature He saved me from. I see what I would look life if I lived a life completely in the flesh, and I thank God I don't have to be enslaved to that nature (even though I give into it more times than I want to).<br /><br />So why the title "Who (or what) is your donkey"? The Lord reminded me this week about the story of Balaam and his donkey in Numbers 22. If you're not familiar with the story, I would encourage you to read all of Numbers 22. I have pasted verses 21-34 below. After you read the verses I will share what the Lord put on my heart concerning my situation.<br /><br /><br /><br />Balaam's Donkey - Numbers 22<br /><br />21 Balaam got up in the morning, saddled his donkey and went with the princes of Moab. 22 But God was very angry when he went, and the angel of the LORD stood in the road to oppose him. Balaam was riding on his donkey, and his two servants were with him. 23 When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD standing in the road with a drawn sword in his hand, she turned off the road into a field. Balaam beat her to get her back on the road.<br /><br />24 Then the angel of the LORD stood in a narrow path between two vineyards, with walls on both sides. 25 When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD, she pressed close to the wall, crushing Balaam's foot against it. So he beat her again.<br /><br />26 Then the angel of the LORD moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left. 27 When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD, she lay down under Balaam, and he was angry and beat her with his staff. 28 Then the LORD opened the donkey's mouth, and she said to Balaam, "What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?"<br /><br />29 Balaam answered the donkey, "You have made a fool of me! If I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now."<br /><br />30 The donkey said to Balaam, "Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?"<br />"No," he said.<br /><br />31 Then the LORD opened Balaam's eyes, and he saw the angel of the LORD standing in the road with his sword drawn. So he bowed low and fell facedown.<br /><br />32 The angel of the LORD asked him, "Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to oppose you because your path is a reckless one before me. [c] 33 The donkey saw me and turned away from me these three times. If she had not turned away, I would certainly have killed you by now, but I would have spared her."<br /><br />34 Balaam said to the angel of the LORD, "I have sinned. I did not realize you were standing in the road to oppose me. Now if you are displeased, I will go back."<br /><br />I want to highlight verse 32. Read it again:<br /><br />The angel of the LORD asked him, "Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to oppose you because your path is a reckless one before me.<br /><br />I'm not trying to be funny here at all, nor disrespectful. But I saw my son as the donkey. I saw how God sees my path is a reckless one before Him and he puts these difficult circumstances in my path to CHANGE MY COURSE. It is His grace and love for me that causes this. And ultimately I am beating (getting angry) with the very instrument that God is using to REDIRECT my path, to draw out my sin, so I can confess it, repent it, and be free from that bondage, so I can be a vessel that is useful for Him.<br /><br />I have noticed other "donkeys" this week as well. Pretty much anything (or person) that brings out my sin can represent the donkey. The donkey is the instrument that God is using to draw out my sin and refine me into the image of Christ. I can choose to see my sin and repent, or I can beat my donkey and blame IT for my reckless course.<br /><br />As I type I am reminded of James 1:2-4<br /><br />"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."<br /><br />I have a new sense of appreciation for the difficult things in my life and know that it is God's perfect love for me that desires to make me like Christ so I can live in freedom to worship Him as He deserves. And really, there is nothing, NOTHING that compares to the joy that I have in Him. My love for Him has grown so much through the trials that I would NEVER choose a life of comfort and ease if that meant it would replace the intimacy that I have with Him. He is SO worth every hardship if it means I can know Him more!<br /><br />So think about it. Who or what, is your donkey? Who or what has God put in your path to reveal your sin, to show you that your path is a reckless one before you? Don't get angry with it, but change your course!The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-16466341420978297052009-10-24T09:22:00.003-04:002009-10-24T09:30:17.610-04:00Why I took a sabbatical from FacebookMy last status mentioned that I had been praying about many things. I know some people think God will just show you His will and we don't need to stress about it. There was a time i didn't stress over those things. But my relationship with the Lord is very real, very personal, and very much alive. I will notice if He begins to pull away from me, so I cannot just sit back and relax. I have sought hard after Him for many years to obtain an intimacy that I only envied in others. His Word says if you seek Him with all your heart, you WILL find Him. I took Him at His Word. I faithfully got up every morning and fought to know Him even though I felt nothing. I felt He was far away. I did not understand or enjoy reading His Word. Not at first anyway. But the Lord began to open my eyes to see.<br /><br />One day I was studying the word "word". Hebrews 4:12 says, "For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." I studied more of the word "Word" and discovered the different meanings in the original language. Some verses that have the word "word"in the Greek mean "logos" which translated means the "written word". Other verses in Greek that have the word "word" is translated "rhemas" This word means "God breathed". My eyes were peeled open that day because I was reading the Bible as the "logos" word of God. It was words on a page. That is how a non-Christian reads the Word of God. Without the Holy Spirit breathing life onto His Word and making it a reality in your heart, you will not understand the Rhemas Word of God. From that day on I prayed the the Lord would breathe life on the words that I read - that He would make the "logos word" into a "rhemas word" in my heart. I KNEW without Him breathing on them, I would not understand them.<br /><br />I hear so many people use the phrase, "There is NOTHING like (fill in the blank)...." I think in my heart - "Oh yes there is!" There is something WAY better! When God reveals something in our hearts there is NO greater joy! NONE! Some people can think I have lost my mind, or that I just can't have fun anymore. It's not that, I just compare it to the joy that I have with being in love with my Lord. When I see myself slipping away from that love and enjoying the things of the world a little too much, I realize what I am losing, and whose face I am spitting into.<br /><br />I think that is what I have done - Spit in the face of the one who gave me life - who gives me breath everyday. He created me, He loves me. He died for me. I gave my life to Him. FULLY to Him, and I have taken some back. Every morning when I get up, and I go to my computer and check my Facebook before I have spent time with the one who gave me life, I am spitting in His face. It may sound drastic, but as I was reading Joshua 7 this morning, it hit me afresh. I have allowed (what appears to be innocent) idols in my life, and I believe the Lord has been trying to show me that for some time and I have done like Achan (in Joshua 7), and hid it. As if I can hide anything from God. : ) The sad part is, I know I can't hide anything from God. I just think most of us deceive OURSELVES and think we do not hold idols above Christ, and that is why we are not experiencing the power of the Spirit in our lives. But when the Lord wants to reveal those idols, He will send hardships to get our attention. If we do not admit that we put things (or others) above Christ we are deceiving ourselves. Most often people ignore their own personal sin whe they go through hardships and try to "Make the best of it" instead of realizing that God is exposing sin in our hearts. This is a dangerous place to be.<br /><br />I will paste Joshua 7 below. I know it's long, but so worth the read.<br /><br />Achan's Sin<br /><br />1 But the Israelites acted unfaithfully in regard to the devoted things [a] ; Achan son of Carmi, the son of Zimri, [b] the son of Zerah, of the tribe of Judah, took some of them. So the LORD's anger burned against Israel.<br /><br />2 Now Joshua sent men from Jericho to Ai, which is near Beth Aven to the east of Bethel, and told them, "Go up and spy out the region." So the men went up and spied out Ai.<br /><br />3 When they returned to Joshua, they said, "Not all the people will have to go up against Ai. Send two or three thousand men to take it and do not weary all the people, for only a few men are there." 4 So about three thousand men went up; but they were routed by the men of Ai, 5 who killed about thirty-six of them. They chased the Israelites from the city gate as far as the stone quarries [c] and struck them down on the slopes. At this the hearts of the people melted and became like water.<br /><br />6 Then Joshua tore his clothes and fell facedown to the ground before the ark of the LORD, remaining there till evening. The elders of Israel did the same, and sprinkled dust on their heads. 7 And Joshua said, "Ah, Sovereign LORD, why did you ever bring this people across the Jordan to deliver us into the hands of the Amorites to destroy us? If only we had been content to stay on the other side of the Jordan! 8 O Lord, what can I say, now that Israel has been routed by its enemies? 9 The Canaanites and the other people of the country will hear about this and they will surround us and wipe out our name from the earth. What then will you do for your own great name?"<br /><br />10 The LORD said to Joshua, "Stand up! What are you doing down on your face? 11 Israel has sinned; they have violated my covenant, which I commanded them to keep. They have taken some of the devoted things; they have stolen, they have lied, they have put them with their own possessions. 12 That is why the Israelites cannot stand against their enemies; they turn their backs and run because they have been made liable to destruction. I will not be with you anymore unless you destroy whatever among you is devoted to destruction.<br /><br />13 "Go, consecrate the people. Tell them, 'Consecrate yourselves in preparation for tomorrow; for this is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: That which is devoted is among you, O Israel. You cannot stand against your enemies until you remove it.<br /><br />14 " 'In the morning, present yourselves tribe by tribe. The tribe that the LORD takes shall come forward clan by clan; the clan that the LORD takes shall come forward family by family; and the family that the LORD takes shall come forward man by man. 15 He who is caught with the devoted things shall be destroyed by fire, along with all that belongs to him. He has violated the covenant of the LORD and has done a disgraceful thing in Israel!' "<br /><br />16 Early the next morning Joshua had Israel come forward by tribes, and Judah was taken. 17 The clans of Judah came forward, and he took the Zerahites. He had the clan of the Zerahites come forward by families, and Zimri was taken. 18 Joshua had his family come forward man by man, and Achan son of Carmi, the son of Zimri, the son of Zerah, of the tribe of Judah, was taken.<br /><br />19 Then Joshua said to Achan, "My son, give glory to the LORD, [d] the God of Israel, and give him the praise. [e] Tell me what you have done; do not hide it from me."<br /><br />20 Achan replied, "It is true! I have sinned against the LORD, the God of Israel. This is what I have done: 21 When I saw in the plunder a beautiful robe from Babylonia, [f] two hundred shekels [g] of silver and a wedge of gold weighing fifty shekels, [h] I coveted them and took them. They are hidden in the ground inside my tent, with the silver underneath."<br /><br />22 So Joshua sent messengers, and they ran to the tent, and there it was, hidden in his tent, with the silver underneath. 23 They took the things from the tent, brought them to Joshua and all the Israelites and spread them out before the LORD.<br /><br />24 Then Joshua, together with all Israel, took Achan son of Zerah, the silver, the robe, the gold wedge, his sons and daughters, his cattle, donkeys and sheep, his tent and all that he had, to the Valley of Achor. 25 Joshua said, "Why have you brought this trouble on us? The LORD will bring trouble on you today."<br />Then all Israel stoned him, and after they had stoned the rest, they burned them. 26 Over Achan they heaped up a large pile of rocks, which remains to this day. Then the LORD turned from his fierce anger. Therefore that place has been called the Valley of Achor [i] ever since.<br /><br /><br />If you haven't already read it, I encourage you to read the note I put up yesterday by Beth Moore. (http://livingproofministries.blogspot.com/2009/10/like-slaves-in-search-of-little-masters.html). That really convicted me yesterday. And I am ashamed that I have allowed several little threads to hold me in bondage, and ultimately will keep me from walking in the power of the Spirit that I so desperately desire.<br /><br />Since i will be taking a break form FB for at least a month (If I cannot keep Christ first it has to go altogether), I will not see comments on this page. I will however post this entry onto my blog and I can see comments there. I would love to hear your thoughts. My e-mail and phone number is also in my info page if anyone needs to get a hold of me there.<br /><br />As I go, I will be praying for all of my FB friends. : )<br /><br />Blessing,<br />Christina : )The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-50285134205991509262009-02-24T19:21:00.006-05:002009-02-26T00:03:45.354-05:00David's Testimony<span style="font-size:130%;">Once again, I cannot believe how long its been since our last post. It is so hard to put into words all the Lord is doing in us. Well, if we were sitting face to face having coffee, I usually never lack for words, but in a blog entry, I know you don't have 2 hours to sit and read. : ) I do have a particular reason for posting this entry today. I wanted to preface it with a bit of background so any new readers will fully grasp the miracle that our mighty God has done. I in no way want to take credit for what the Lord has done, and want to be sure He receives every bit of the glory He is due.
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<br />My oldest son David, who just turned 14 last month, was diagnosed with autism when he was 20 months old. He was considered high functioning and progressed quite well through the many therapy programs he went through for several years. We chose to homeschool by the Lord's leading when all other options through the public school failed. We came to realize when David was around 10, that he had Aspergers Syndrome (a high functioning form of autism). If you don't know much about AS, I will just be brief as this will be too long to go into that detail. David is extremely bright and does not struggle in academics, but struggles a great deal socially, and emotionally. There are many other concerns with fine motor skills and sensory issues that affect much of how he is as well, but for now I will focus on his inability to be flexible, and his difficulties to see things outside of himself. Transition is very challenging for kids with AS, and they see things from a very skewed perspective. I know we are all selfish, but typically we have a filter (a conscience) that tells us what is appropriate to say out loud and what we should not. David does not have that filter. There is a major issue with anger and anxiety that lies so deep in the depths of his heart, that had made the past 13 years extremely challenging. When David did go to school for a couple of years, his anger and anxiety hit a level that really concerned us. We pleaded with our Dr. for help. I NEEDED someone to direct us to some help. I wrote a letter to the neurologist that diagnosed him and explained precisely what we were dealing with so I would not leave anything out, and we didn't waste each others time. After reading my letter, the Dr. looked at me and said, "A behavioral program, or the health food store is not going to fix this. The root problem is anxiety and the only help is to put him on medication". We discussed the possibilities although that was a last resort for us. We almost felt we were at that point as David began to get very angry and even sometimes violent. We were not willing to go down that route as the Dr. explained that the type of medication he needed to be on was not recommended for children under the age of 18, and the side effects were depression and suicide.
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<br />We went home and cried and prayed. As we prayed, we were reminded of something we have read many times in God's Word. You see, the Dr. said there is no cure for anxiety other than medication, but I could not help but be reminded of <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Philippians 4:6-7</span>
<br /><sup style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);" id="en-NIV-29433" class="versenum" value="6">6</sup><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. </span><sup style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);" id="en-NIV-29434" class="versenum" value="7">7</sup><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.</span>
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<br />There is a cure for anxiety, but we were very aware this needed to be a God thing. We were also very aware that if God didn't get a hold of David's heart, that medication may be in his future, but we would commit ourselves to the power of the Holy Spirit to lead David to Christ and to help David see his need for the Lord to get him through this. So many times our words fell on deaf ears. I will admit we were inconsistent with our parenting, and often times were driven to anger ourselves, which made us feel like complete failures. But never did we back down on the standards of God's Word, and what HE required of us. David has grown tremendously over the years as far as how he dealt with things outwardly, but the anger was still very prevalent. it was so evident because that was always his first resort and often times it was to forgo a consequence. We hit these issues of the heart every time, as we believe it is the heart that is the wellspring of our behavior. If the heart is right, the behavior will flow out of a natural love for God and not just because of correction. Again, we have continued to see growth in David, but something happened this past weekend that I believe is a memorial stone in David's life and ours. I wish you had the time to hear all the details (and I wish I could even remember them all) of how these events came together, but I want to share with you a testimony that David wrote yesterday. In his homeschool lesson he was required to write a speech that he was to give to a certain audience. He chose to write his testimony. We were completely blown away by what this 14 year old wrote. One thing we do love about David is his honesty. He does not say what he does not mean - and you will see that in his testimony. He does not pull any punches.
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<br />Before I end with David's testimony, I again want to give glory to God for His Word, His promises and His faithfulness. We are so unworthy of what He has done, and we thank Him for His indescribable grace!
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<br />(This is a rough draft, so it has several errors- and it is very long)
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mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} .MsoChpDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; mso-default-props:yes; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} .MsoPapDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; margin-bottom:10.0pt; line-height:115%;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.0in 1.0in 1.0in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";color:black;" >Hello and welcome, this is David Cooke, and I'll be speaking to you all about my testimony and hope you have the patience to listen.
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<br /> First Main Point- My Struggles to get to where I am now
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<br /> Trust me, I'm not fully grown. Not that it's possible. But I'm nowhere near being a really strong Christian. I'm still spiritually young, however I want this to give people encouragement to get through the early stages of Christian growth. I've had a lot of struggles spiritually during my time, however I've really been thrown into the crossfire of spiritual warfare in the past few months, and I hope hearing about mine will help you to grow spiritually stronger.
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<br /> Subpoint A- Seven Years Old and My "Conversion Experience" which really meant little
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<br /> Sometime when I was a seven years old I asked my mom how to be saved. I don't remember the exact words she used, but the answer was not really correct. She told me simply to pray a prayer and Jesus would come into my heart and I'd be saved. The bible never says that! I don't even remember the motives behind it, was it a real genuine wish to be saved, or was it just to please my parents, it doesn't matter! There is nothing in the bible that tells you to pray a prayer to ask Jesus into your heart and you'll be saved. Jesus says in Luke 13:3 No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish. Note that he does not say No I tell you; but unless you ask me into your heart you will all likewise perish. And It's not anything to do with a lack of forcefulness in those words, it's not the point. Jesus says it clearly again in in Luke 13:5 No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish. Just 2 verses later! He must mean it!
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<br /> He also says in Luke 9:23 And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. What is denying yourself? It means that it's not all about me or you, It's about others and even more Importantly It's about Jesus, the son of God.
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<br /> I learned in sunday school one time about JOY. JOY stood for Jesus, Others, and You. And Jesus, at the front, is the most important of all. Others, in the middle, are more important then you, and you are last. The bible fully supports this in Philippians 2:3hp Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Oh what my parents hadn't taught me at the time. I don't think they had yet come to the knowledge themselves. I started having doubts at the age of 10, and thought that they were just strange, insincerities that could never be backed up in scripture. I was wrong, they are backed up quite strongly in scripture, as I have shown you.
<br /> Subpoint B- Preparing a move to Little Rock- I didn't care but I do now
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<br /> It was March of 2007, the first of my struggles on my walk with God, or, If I had one at the time. Most of the time up till then, there really wasn't much happening. I had a happy life in Lehigh Acres Florida, two wonderful friends and some neighborhood kids to play football, and just nothing seemed to matter but me.
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<br /> Or, In my mind, that was all that seemed to matter.
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<br /> Nothing was really that important. I went to church every week with some likely false assurance of being a Christian. I didn't know all the other stuff that's involved, like denying yourself and repenting. I prayed a prayer, so I was saved, right?
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<br /> Wrong!
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<br /> As I said earlier, the bible nowhere supports the idea that being saved is just merely praying a prayer. But my either unsaved self or very baby Christian self showed itself the day my parents told me we were leaving home and going to Little Rock eventually. We didn't know how long it would take, but we in practice ended up having 15 months before we even left our house and 2 more before leaving state. We still aren't there.
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<br /> That night I cried a lot, understandable, and I didn't want to go, understandable. But time and time again I told them we shouldn't do it. Why? I didn't want to leave my friends in Southwest Florida.
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<br /> What were we to do there? We were going to work for Family Life, a subsidiary of Campus Crusade for Christ, and it worked with marriages and families. Did I care then about the many families that could have their marriages saved because of what my parents would do through that organization? No! But should I have, and should it have been expected of me to have? You bet your lifesaver!
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<br /> Besides, they were fulfilling the Great Commission, found in Matthew 28:19-20 Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age."
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<br /> Now, I pray to the Lord who saved me that we will get there as quickly as possible and do the work there he would have us.
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<br />Subpoint C- Thirteen Years Old and really starting to learn what it means to be a Christian through my parents
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<br /> In March, 2008, we went to The Transformed Conference at our church, McGregor Baptist, done by the way of the master. It was there that I learned about false conversion, ways to witness, exc. I thought for a time I got saved that day, but I would later learn (Or maybe deep down I knew then) that just knowing the truth wasn't enough. I had never repented that I knew of, really. I still didn't understand.
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<br /> In July, 2008, we had to move out of our house because the people we had recently sold it to moved in. We went to live with our Aunt Gina and Uncle Ricky in Ft. Myers. It was a heavy and frustrating transitional period, and my severe anger problem, buried for at least a year, attacked again.
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<br /> I also started having doubts about my salvation, and when I talked to my parents, they really understood them and I was really correct to be unsure about my spiritual standing. The bible says in 2Corinthians 13:5 examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?--unless indeed you fail to meet the test!
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<br /> Paul Washer, a great, convicting full-time preacher said something along the lines of "Examine yourself to see if you are in the faith. Don't ask yourself whether you have repented, but whether you continue to repent today. Don't ask yourself whether you have believed, but whether you are continuing to believe today.
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<br /> It seems that the bible supports the idea that salvation is not merely a prayer, but that you must examine yourself and see whether you are continuing to believe in him and repent. Do you hate your sin? Many of us, including myself often, do not. If you do not, ask God to help you to hate it and love him. If you don't know it, ask him to show you. Subpoint D- The "(John) and (Dennis) Incidents" and how to handle them
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<br /> Two incidents in consecutive weeks have helped grow my faith to where it is now. I didn't handle them all too well, but I later learned the right thing to do and will help me to grow in the future. They both occurred at the youth group at Calvary Baptist Church with two annoying kids at youth group named (John) and (Dennis). It may not be surprising for you to hear that they are friends.
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<br /> (John) is a kid at youth group who is always very annoying, but a particularly annoying habit he has is to throw wet paper towels into my stall (And heaven only knows how he knew I was in there.) What I did at the time was threaten to hurt him, but in reality, I asked a youth leader to talk to him. Although that action was in the right, it was wrong for me to threaten him like I did.
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<br /> On the way home, I was repeating and repeating to my dad how I wanted to punch him, how I didn't care that it was wrong exc. And this was only last week. This week a lot has changed!
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<br /> (Dennis) is an annoying kid at youth group, who, like (John), always wants a reaction. To get one, he breaks a cookie and drops it on my lap. What did I do? A reasonably good choice, but not the best one. I told him to pick it up and upon his refusal I told a youth group leader who made him clean it up. What would have been the ideal choice.
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<br /> My mom summed it up well in these words "Turning the other cheek that is in this case cleaning it up is the only thing that has power To show Jesus' love. Jesus backs up her opinion in Matthew 5:39 But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. This is the biblical thing to do.
<br /> Subpoint E- Fourteen and still much to learn
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<br /> If you think that by listening to me all this time that I think I'm a self-righteous jerk who thinks I'm better than everyone else, you are gravely mistaking.
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<br /> As I briefly mentioned earlier, I have a severe anger problem I am trying to defeat, but I'm not so sure I can alone. I need to trust God to help me get past those problems in his timing which will help me to be a greater witness for him. As you may see, my testimony is not really complete, nor is anyone's. The Christian, either a long-time Christian or a reasonably new one like me (Though I don't know the exact time which I got saved) We are always learning new things about God. If you're still a child living at home, you may be thinking, "I can't do anything for God, I'm too young." Whether it be Satan or society, don't let them lie to you. The book, Do Hard Things is a book for teens, by teens, and they certainly aren't bound by that lie. Second Main Point- Who says young people can't do big things for God?
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<br /> It may seem impossible for a young person to do things for God, but it really isn't. I have read some of the book Do Hard Things which tells about some teens that really did go out and take on huge responsibility. In this part of the speech, I'll tell you about this book, my personal example of a time I took a small, Although you may consider it big, it really isn't, example of doing something for God, and my big plans for the future which may not correspond with yours. As is said in Veggie Tales "Little guys can do big things too." Subpoint A- The Do Hard Things book and 1 Timothy 4:12
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<br /> 1Timothy 4:12 Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.
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<br /> After reading that verse, do you still think it's impossible for the young to do big things for God? It's not.
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<br /> In the Do Hard Things book, the authors (Two brothers wrote it) told three stories about t teens from long ago who did Hard Things. Here are two of the stories in my own words.
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<br /> A man named George was born in Northern Virginia in 1732 to a middle class family, and he lost his father at 11. At 16, he had mastered advanced math such as geometry and calculus. At seventeen, he was official surveyor of Culpeper County, Virginia. This was a man's job and was heavy work. He grew up to become the first President of the United States, George Washington.
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<br /> David, not me, different David, was ten when he began his career at sea, and at 12 he was given command of a vessel that was captured during the War of 1812, and had a mission to return it to the United States. The former British Captain was upset about being ordered around by a 12 year old. He was allowed to keep his pistols, A symbol of his position, out of respect, and he said he'd go on deck with them. David responded by telling him if he did he'd be shot and thrown overboard. The former captain believed him and stayed below.
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<br /> Talk about guts! And over something worldly! And we don't have the guts to tell our friends the greatest news in the world, eternal news about Jesus. Neither do I, but it's a problem. Remember the Great Commission: Matthew 28:19-20 Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age." This applies to the young and the old. Subpoint B- Handing Out Tracts in the mall
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<br /> As I previously admitted, I'd call myself a young and immature Christian who has much to learn and much to do. However, the bible supports the idea that the young can do big things, and I have done something reasonably small that proves the idea that the young as well as the old can fulfill the great Commission.
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<br /> The story started on Saturday, February 14, when my dad told me that that next Saturday the Schmitts were going to go to the mall to witness to people. I originally had no desire to go, but quickly changed my mind Sunday Morning. That changed quickly on Sunday Night, when I had my issue with (John), I realized that, if I can't handle that, am I ready to witness? But I decided to go, and handed out six tracts at the mall. I didn't talk to anyone, but I put the gospel into their hands. You can surely do the same.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";color:black;" ><o:p> </o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="line-height: 115%;font-family:";color:black;" >Subpoint C- My dreams for the future, and why should you care?
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<br /> My dream for the future a week ago? Make Video Games, be an author, something along those lines. Now? I want to proclaim the gospel. Am I a person who cares for nothing worldly and only the spiritual? Far from it! However, I am a person who wants to please God and grow closer to him, and to fulfill the Great Commission. Every Christian's dream should be the same.</span></span></p> <span style="font-size:130%;">
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<br />The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-76226810022278852442008-10-25T22:53:00.005-04:002008-10-25T23:51:15.503-04:00Family Worship<span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:georgia;"><br /><br />We mentioned in our last newsletter that we would be doing a blog entry on Family Worship. A friend was telling us recently of a pastor that was interviewing for a position at a church. The Senior Pastor asked him if he was in a regular routine of leading his family in daily worship. His thought was the same as mine. When I think of worship, I typically think of singing. But that is not what the pastor meant.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Recently Dave and I listened to a Familylife radio broadcast that featured a pastor named Voddie Baucham. He talked about the importance of fathers being the Prophets, Priests, Providers, and Protectors in their home, and the responsibility of fathers to disciple their families - not the churches responsibility, but fathers. There will be situations where the father , for reason, is absent (whether in body or in spirit), and in that case it would be the mom. The point of this post is to encourage families that the responsibility of discipling our children comes from home, and we should not leave it up to others (i.e. the church)to do.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">We listened to the program on a CD in the car while we were traveling form NC to GA. Dave expressed his heart to me about the conviction he felt to lead his family in worship on a daily basis. He has taken this task very seriously. I will share some simple things we have done, but ultimately would love to hear from others what you have done. We would like to hear thoughts, ideas, what you do, or even some frustrations you may have had in this area. If you are like me, you need ideas. What you do will depend on the age of your children, so we would love to hear from families with children of all ages. Nothing is too much or too little. Some of us need to start out small, so please share.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">The way we started out was just picking a topic, verse or book of the Bible to read through and discuss. (Voddie talks about the 3 points he uses - can't remember them exactly, but the gist is, read the verses, discuss what the verses mean, and then talk about how you are going to apply it). We have been going through the book of Philippians, and dissecting it verse by verse. We have a time of prayer, and sing a few worship songs, which we usually let the kids pick. One day, Dave just asked the boys if anyone had a particular verse they wanted to discuss, and Samuel said, "Yes, John 1:12", then proceeded to open his Bible up to the verse and read it out loud - then we all discussed it. Next week, we are going to take turns having the kids lead the worship time. I'm sure tears and frustration will be involved. : )</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">One thing we have been meaning to do for years (see, you're not the only one who procrastinates) : ) is the </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;" >"Family Nights Tool Chest"</span><span style="font-family:georgia;"> that is put out by </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;" >Focus on the Family</span><span style="font-family:georgia;">. These family game nights are set up as a devotional/game night, that include hands on activities to help your children remember the lesson. I pulled the book out last week so I can prepare for a lesson. This is something we would like to do once a week, but if we can even do it once a month, I know it will make a big impact. One example is on the <span style="font-style: italic;">tongue</span> and the power of your words. There is a whole lesson with Bible verses included, but the activity is this: have your kids squeeze an entire tube of toothpaste onto a paper plate. Once it is all out, tell them to now put it ALL back in. of course they will tell you that is impossible. In which you would reply, "Yes, and it is the same with our words. Once they leave your mouth, you cannot take them back."</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Another good resource that is simple but will have great long term rewards (especially for kids 12 and under), is a book called </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;" >"Big Truths for Little Kids"</span><span style="font-family:georgia;">, by Susan and Richie Hunt. This book has great stories, and goes through the catechisms. A catechism is a set of questions and answers learned or memorized to teach a body of information. This book uses questions, answers, stories, scripture and prayer to help you communicate the character of God. It is fun for us as well, because we learn them too. I tested a friend on some basic questions and she failed. She felt the need to get the book herself to learn the right answers. : )</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;"> Click </span><a style="font-family: georgia;" href="http://www.familylife.com/site/apps/nlnet/content3.aspx?c=dnJHKLNnFoG&b=3789887&ct=4982927">HERE</a><span style="font-family:georgia;"> to access audio or written transcript of Voddie Baucham's program. </span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;"> We just ordered Voddie's book, that talks more about raising our kids is this culture we live in today. It is called </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;" >"Family Driven Faith"</span><span style="font-family:georgia;">.</span></span><br /><br /><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:georgia;">Our family has so much to learn, and having these times of worship with our boys is bringing out some of those things.</span></span> <span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > We have had a great opportunity to hit some serious heart issues, and talk to our boys about the responsibility we have as believers in Christ, to prepare our hearts for God to do the work that only He can do.</span> <span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:georgia;">Some hard truths have come out, and it has given each of us an opportunity to examine ourselves, to see if we are in the faith (2 Cor. 13:5), and talk about the Cost of being a disciple of Christ (Luke 14;26-33)</span></span>.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:georgia;">We look forward to hearing from you..</span></span>.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" >Praying the Lord will bless every effort you put forth to bring Him the glory and honor He is so worthy of...<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-29508455920405274642008-08-04T21:15:00.005-04:002008-08-04T23:01:29.744-04:00The Journey Continues<span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br />I wish we had been better at keeping our blog updated. I have many things written in my journal, and we have shared snippets of things we have learned between the blog and our monthly newsletters (available on our website), but unfortunately we have not tracked enough. Dave & I have experienced some things spiritually over the past year that have pretty much rocked our world. We have seen God in a way we never have, and we have truly been challenged in what it means to live the Christian life - the crucified life. frankly, it is quite scary. Scary because I know our eyes have been opened to see the truth of God's Word, and am afraid for so many that have never been shown the Word of God for what it really is. I am ashamed to say that for many years I thought I was </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" >OK</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > spiritually because unfortunately I compared myself to those around me and thought I was just like every other Christian I know.<br /><br />I am grateful that the Lord brought circumstances in my life that I truly could not handle in my own power and caused me to seek Him out of desperation for His power just to make it through with some kind of success, lest I look foolish for screwing it all up. I am afraid my motives were not always so pure and I did not even see it.<br /><br />About 2 1/2 years ago, I wrote an e-mail that I placed in my journal because it had great significance of the realization of where I was at spiritually. I recognized for the first time in my life that I was not living the Spirit filled life that I read about in the Bible. The Bible says "You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you", and I felt I was very far from that power. I did not believe it was anything mystical, nor did I feel that i would go around healing people or speaking in tongues like they did at Pentecost. I wasn't really looking for anything magical, but I knew I was missing something. In fact, something that concerned me was when I would talk to others about it, they would engage me funny and not seem to know what I meant. they would ask questions like why I didn't feel I WAS walking in the Spirit, yet when I asked them if they felt they were, the answer was typically, no. That kind of bothered me especially coming from people I looked up to spiritually, people that are leading in our church. I wasn't looking to judge ANYONE, yet when I looked at others, I felt they didn't really have what I was missing either. I wasn't even quite sure WHAT it was supposed to look like, but there was a great gnawing in my heart, and today it is evident that God was piercing me. He had so much to empty me of and to teach me, and I was so blind - so prideful. I will never say I am not blind. As I was learning of my spiritual blindness, the Lord began to open my eyes to see like I never saw before. I began to read scripture in a new way - a way that is so real and alive. As I read all the verses in the New Testament about blindness, i saw the </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" >correlation</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > between the physical and the Spiritual. In John 9:35-41, I saw that I was much like the Pharisees. And </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" >unfortunately</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > as I talk with others around me, people are not quick to admit that they are blind (spiritually). Here are the verses.<br /><br /><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" id="en-NIV-26465" class="sup" >35</span><span style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Jesus heard that they had thrown him out, and when he found him, he said, "Do you believe in the Son of Man?" </span><p style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;"> <span id="en-NIV-26466" class="sup" style="font-size:130%;">36</span><span style="font-size:130%;">"Who is he, sir?" the man asked. "Tell me so that I may believe in him." </span></p> <p style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;"> <span id="en-NIV-26467" class="sup" style="font-size:130%;">37</span><span style="font-size:130%;">Jesus said, "You have now seen him; in fact, he is the one speaking with you." </span></p> <p style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;"> <span id="en-NIV-26468" class="sup" style="font-size:130%;">38</span><span style="font-size:130%;">Then the man said, "Lord, I believe," and he worshiped him. </span></p> <p style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;"> <span id="en-NIV-26469" class="sup" style="font-size:130%;">39</span><span style="font-size:130%;">Jesus said, "For judgment I have come into this world, so that the blind will see and those who see will become blind." </span></p> <p style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;"> <span id="en-NIV-26470" class="sup" style="font-size:130%;">40</span><span style="font-size:130%;">Some Pharisees who were with him heard him say this and asked, "What? Are we blind too?" </span></p> <p style="color: rgb(102, 0, 204);font-family:verdana;"> <span id="en-NIV-26471" class="sup" style="font-size:130%;">41</span><span style="font-size:130%;">Jesus said, "If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains.</span></p><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><br />So many think they are on the right track as I did. I was so much like a Pharisee in many ways. As I began to really study the Word, it became a mirror to me - seeing myself in light of who God is, and what HIS standards are, as opposed to </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" >comparing</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > myself with others, and their standards. Now I read the Word and see how </span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Holiness </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >is</span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >what God requires, and His Word says, "without holiness, </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" >no one</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > will see the Lord" (Heb. 12:14)- that is a sobering thought.<br /><br />Over this past year, many challenges have been brought our way, and we came kicking and </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" >screaming</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > through some of it - </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" >especially</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > when it came to protecting my rights against being hurt and rejected. I am such a people </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" ><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">pleaser</span></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > and I want so much (too much) for others to be pleased with me. I do not handle rejection very well, and much of that has come my </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" >way</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > over the past 15 months - more than I can handle at times. As I cried out to God many times, He challenged me on those rights and made it very clear to me that I did not have any. I </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" >remember</span><span style="font-family:verdana;"> <span style="font-size:130%;">one day sitting in our school room and crying in prayer about how hurt I was over a </span></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" >situation</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > and God gently showed me how I was </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11" >making</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > it about me. I questioned Him and asked if I had the right to be upset over how I was treated. His answer was very gentle yet very firm - "No, you do NOT have any rights. the day you gave your life to me, you gave up those rights". I have to say that I did not repent right then and turn from my wicked ways. I battled </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12" >for</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > some time (and am still struggling with this reality). But God showed me something that day that was new to me - something I think </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13" >that</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > is new to many. </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14" >And</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > I say that because </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15" >EVERY</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > person I have shared that story with (and it has been many), have all had the same response, "Well, you do have the right to be upset". I know, it sounds good, but it is not the life that Jesus lived - not the crucified life where we are told that in order to be Christ's disciples we must "Deny ourselves daily, take up our cross and follow Him". (Luke 9:23). I wanted so much to hold onto these rights, but frankly the hurt came so often that i was tired of being hurt. I came to realize the attacks were not going to stop, and in fact it may get worse. the only thing to do was to deny myself, deny my rights, so I can have freedom FROM the hurt. taking up our cross daily means to crucify the flesh daily, and that includes crucifying our rights - especially seeing the example Jesus gave as He held onto to NONE of His rights and He is the ONLY one that <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">deserves</span> to keep them.<br /><br />I heard a great quote once that my friend shared with me years ago, and today I see it as reality in my life. It goes something </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_16" >like</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > this:<br /><br />"To </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_17" >inoculate</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > me from the praise of man, He baptized me in the </span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_18" >criticism</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" > of man, until I was no longer under the control of man."<br /><br />This quote means so much to me now, and I am beginning to feel that freedom. It still hurts, but I no longer try to protect those rights. I know they do not belong to me.<br /><br />One thing God has revealed to both Dave and me - and my husband has taught me a lot in this area, is that everything, EVERYTHING that we do, every circumstance that comes our way is for the purpose of bringing glory to God. The attitude in which we have in our hearts toward God and toward others during the most trying of times truly tells of our character and relationship with Christ - a reflection of where we are on our path towards holiness. God has convicted me many times of the condition of my heart, even though outwardly I went through the right motions. He has shown me how my righteous acts are like filthy rags to Him, and ANYTHING I do in my OWN power cannot bring Him glory. Then how CAN I bring Him glory, as it seems I do so much in my own power? This is what we have been learning this past year - to surrender our hearts fully, wholly to Christ, so He (and only He can) change our heart, so the power of the Spirit can flow and do what only He can do. What my hearts feel is a good tester of how much of "me" is still in there.<br /><br />This journey we continue to travel comes with much hardship, but we rejoice in the fact that the Bible assures us that every believer will face hardship. Because of the desire to bring glory to God, we are challenged to embrace these difficult times with fresh hearts and healed eyes. Of course we continue to submit to our flesh more times that we want to, but when we put our heads on the pillow at night - even through tears at times - we truly thank God for the circumstances that He continues to bring our way that are refining our hearts to shape them into the image of Christ.<br /><br />We have more trials to face, ones we see and ones we don't see. The next challenge in our journey that we face is Dave stepping down from his current job, in order to start raising support full time. this is a HUGE (somewhat scary) step for us to take, as we will have to finish our support before a certain time, where as before we were not under that pressure.<br /><br />This <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">change</span> will take place within the next couple of weeks, and we will take some <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">time</span> to visit with family and take the kids on a much needed short vacation before we head up to NY to raise support there. there is no telling of what that will look like, but we are trusting the Lord to continue to guide us every step of the way. He has provided a place for us to stay already and we are so grateful for that. it will be small and our family will become very intimate (or perhaps enemies) : ) The Lord's continued provision for us has been unbelievable. And I say unbelievable, because we have never trusted Him in this way before because we have typically made our own plans of how we do things. Trusting God in a radical way can bring much fear as you are no longer in control, and now we do things HIS way. I don't <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">know</span> why we ever doubted that He would provide this way, but it was perhaps because we <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">weren't</span> willing to have what HE wanted us to have as opposed to what WE wanted us to have.<br /><br />Since the selling of our house and getting rid of so much stuff, we realized how much we have accumulated our own desires and then expected God to provide for them. Dave continues to tell people that we <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">ar</span>e "Happily Homeless." We laugh because in part that is true - we do feel very free, but on the other hand, we do look forward to settling into our own place and getting back into a normal routine. We will try to make the next couple of months a fun adventure for the boys and we trust that this time will be a great Spiritual marker for all of us, as we continue to be stretched along <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">the</span> way.<br /><br />By His grace, and for His glory.....<br /><br /><br /><br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-53163519142067041022008-07-17T09:24:00.003-04:002008-07-17T09:44:59.446-04:00Just some updates<span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:times new roman;"><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Wow! I just realized I have not posted anything in 5 months! It's a good thing Dave has done a couple - I have been slacking! We are in the midst of packing and boxes everywhere. We have moved several times before but we have to be very strategic in our packing this time. We have to pack with the idea that we may not see some of this stuff for a long time. I have also noticed how attached I can be to things. I didn't realize it until it was time to part with it. Even after the 2 van fulls of boxes we sent to my neighbor's for a yard sale, I still feel like we have too much stuff - and we probably do.</span></span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Well, our closing is scheduled for Monday (as of today. It seems to change frequently ) :) - so our plan is to move out on Saturday and clean for the new family on Sunday. David spent the past 2 nights at his friend's house and he came home this morning before breakfast. He looked in the pantry (that has about 4 items left in it) and said, "Mom, can you make muffins?" I said no because I packed all my pans. Then he opened the freezer and said, "Can I have waffles?" And I said no, because I packed the toaster. So I told him to have cereal. Then he opened the cabinet to get a bowl and, well, you guessed it, I packed the BOWLS! OK, so I wasn't totally thinking, but I have my ways. I found a container of cool whip in the refrigerator and cleaned it out for him. : ) David's imediate response was, "Arkansas is ruining my life" : ( It was pretty sad that he said that, just because his breakfast plans were not as usual, but with David, and his typical srtuggle with anxiety, this is something that would normally put him over the edge. he handled it pretty well, but it gave me a glimpse of how the next few months may go for him. He has come a long way in a year! We talked about it for alittle bit and he has a pretty good perspective of what's to come, I think he's just tired of the interum - aren't we all?</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">There are still so many lessons to be learned along the way - and life seems to throw us some curve balls, but nothing happens that God doesn't allow to happen and we are being challenged more than ever to be sure we bring Him glory in all things. When things do not go our way, this is a great challenge not to think of ourselves, so we continue to confess our selfishness in this area and God continues to change our hearts.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Please pray for us over the next few months as it will be very outside the norm for our family, and we are trusting God to provide our needs and grow us more into the image of Christ every day.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">To God be the glory in all things!<br /><br /></span><br /></span> <div style="text-align: center;font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);">Psalm 115:1</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);">Not to us, O LORD, not to us </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);"> but to your name be the glory, </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);"> because of your love and faithfulness.<br /><br /><br /></span></span></div><span style=";font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-80348292984910187872008-07-02T17:58:00.005-04:002008-07-02T18:35:09.277-04:00Dave Strikes Again!<span style="font-size:130%;">Wow, the world was so shocked to see a post from me, that the whole blog was silent for 3 months! I guess I'll have to post again!<br /><br />Well, things have certainly been eventful! We have a buyer for our house, and we should be closing at/around the 15th of July. We will be staying with Christina's sister for a month or two, and, if all goes well, we will be heading up to New York in the Fall to try to finish up our support. Exciting times!<br /><br />Support raising has still been a bit slow, but we are praying that we are turning a corner. We know that God has his perfect timing, and, unfortunately, it rarely lines up with ours. (Well actually, that's probably fortunate, because it will be much better in His time, than ours...) We are so thankful for those who have been faithfully supporting us over these last months, and are eternally grateful for those who go above and beyond to "go to bat" for us with people they know, or hold small group gatherings in their home with people that we would probably never have the opportunity to share with otherwise. THANK YOU!!<br /><br />God has continued to bless in a myriad of ways. He is continually refining us and convicting us of our sin. We realize more and more as each day goes on how utterly unworthy we are to even be allowed to live, let alone live eternally in heaven with Christ. Our God is an Awesome God!<br /><br />I will close with a sobering quote from Charles Spurgeon:<br /><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(0, 32, 96);font-family:'Calibri','sans-serif';font-size:130%;" >"Christ will be master of the heart, and sin must be mortified. If your life is unholy your heart is unchanged; you are an unsaved person. If the Saviour has not sanctified you, renewed you, given you a hatred of sin and a love of holiness, the grace which does not make a man better than others is a worthless counterfeit. Christ saves his people, not in their sins, but from them. 'Without holiness no man shall see the Lord.' 'Let every one that nameth the name of Christ depart from iniquity.' If not saved from sin, how shall we hope to be counted among his people. Lord, save me even now from all evil, and enable me to honor my Saviour."<br />-Spurgeon</span><span style="font-size:130%;"><o:p></o:p><br /><br />To God be the Glory!</span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-39718616671192044802008-03-23T23:14:00.007-04:002008-03-24T10:39:35.559-04:00A Message From Dave...<span style="font-size:130%;"> I had to put that in the title, because anyone who regularly reads this blog knows that Christina is the one who does the posting. I have on several occasions wanted to put something up here, but work and other commitments have kept me from it until now.<br /><br /> I am more excited today in my Christian life than I have ever been!! At our church last Saturday, we had a conference called "Transformed", and I don't think I have ever been to a more aptly named event! It was put on by an organization called "The Way of the Master" and you can find a link to their website in our favorite links on the left. One of the speakers, Kirk Cameron, many of you will remember as "Mike Seaver" on the classic sit-com "Growing Pains".<br /><br /> For the most part this was an evangelism conference, and I was most definitely challenged to be more bold in sharing my faith, but even MORE so, I was challenged to live a HOLY life! I believe that the church in America today waters down the message about the horribleness of our sin, and emphasizes the message of God's love and forgiveness. Don't get me wrong, our God is infinitely loving, and His forgiveness knows no bounds, but we treat our sin as if it is no big deal. We continue on in sins that we consider "acceptable". We criticize the drug addict, while we stuff our faces during Holiday dinner. As if drugs were more sinful than gluttony. We explode in anger, justifying it with pithy little sayings like, "That's just how God made me", or "God's still working on me, it's a process, of course..." Well, yes, we are not going to be perfect overnight, or quite honestly, until the day we try on our glorified bodies. However, how long are we going to hang on to the same old sins? How long before we realize that we are offending to Creator of the Universe with our lame excuses? One of the conference speakers, is named Ray Comfort. In addition to speaking at the conference, Ray also preached the sermon on Sunday morning at our church. He gave the following illustration (I am paraphrasing, as I don't have a transcript): "A young boy lived in a house on a lake with his father. He asked his father one day if he could go fishing on the lake. His father told him that he didn't want him to take the boat out by himself on the lake, as there were many alligators in the lake, and he didn't think it was safe. The father told the boy, that if he wanted to fish from the dock, then that should be fine. The boy happily agreed, grabbed his pole and bait, and headed over to the dock. After fishing for a while, the boy got a little bored. He felt that it just wasn't as fun when you weren't out in the boat. He thought that it would be more exciting out in the boat, with the alligators swimming around him. Besides, he would be completely safe in the boat! So he got in the boat, and pushed off from the shore. He was having a great time. He was having fun fishing, and every so often, he would see one of the huge alligators swimming near him. Everything was great until one of the alligators swam too close to the boat, and his tail hit the side, capsizing it! The boy immediately panicked and screamed at the top of his lungs. The father, hearing the noise from the house, ran down to the lake, and without hesitation, leaped into the water, and pulled his son to safety. As the boy struggled to calm himself down, he noticed something alarming... His father's legs were a mangled mess! An alligator had clamped down on his legs while he was pulling his son to safety. Blood was everywhere. Now, how would you feel toward this young lad, if he then stood up and said..."Look, Dad, I really appreciate you pulling me out. That was pretty scary! But it WAS really fun out on the lake, and the alligators WERE exciting to see up close. If you don't mind, I'm going to head back out in the boat. See you later!<br /><br /> You would say that this kid has no appreciation, or understanding of his father's sacrifice. He might as well have ground his father's blood into the dirt.<br /><br /> Guess what... That is EXACTLY what we do, when we knowingly continue to sin after accepting Christ. It IS a process, but the process should be more of God revealing new sin to us over time, not taking years to give up the one's we know about!! For my entire Christian life, I felt sorry for my sin because I knew that I shouldn't do it, but I never fully realized what I am saying to God every time that I sin. I am saying that his sacrifice doesn't mean much to me.<br /><br /></span> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);font-size:130%;" >James 4:7-10 (NLT) says: "So humble yourselves before God, Resist the Devil, and he will flee from you. Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world. Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up in honor."<br /><br /></span><span style="font-size:130%;"> My challenge is this: Let's hold each other accountable. Let's get rid of the logs in our eyes, so we can see clearly to help remove the specks from other's eyes. Let's take seriously </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);font-size:130%;" >Matthew 5:48, "But you are to be perfect, even as your father in heaven is perfect."</span><span style="font-size:130%;"> Cast off the sin that so easily entangles, and race to get the PRIZE!!<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="font-size:130%;">PRAISE THE LORD!<br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:180%;" ><br />HE IS RISEN!!</span><br /><br /><br /><br /></span></span></div>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-32149585391645877212008-02-29T16:06:00.007-05:002008-02-29T17:28:26.628-05:00Unless A Kernal of Wheat falls to the Ground and Dies...<span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br />My friend called me last week and asked me this question, "Christina, when in your life (or if ever) have you ever experienced the resurrection power of Jesus Christ?" My friend is always great for making me think. WOW! That was a deep question - one I had to really think about. The first verse that popped in my mind is the verse that talks about how the same power that raised Christ from the dead also lives in us. Have I known that power? My mind went in every direction over the past 2 years of how I have been on this journey of knowing that power. I wrote about it in my last post. I so desperately want to live in that power, to live knowing it is not my strength but God's. In my Spirit I knew there was so much more, and I prayed, and dug into the Word and listened to the Lord's voice as He led me through (often times not as quickly as I wanted to go).<br /><br />The very next verse that came to mind was :<br /><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >John 12:24</span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);">I cannot even explain the process of how God worked in my heart, but in about 15 minutes I began to journal the whole process over the course of 2 years of what God was up to in all the difficulties that we have gone through - and the difficulties have lasted much longer, but my desperateness to experience the power of the Spirit to overcome the difficulties was more in the past 2 years. As I thought about that verse, it was so clear to me what God had been doing. I knew all along that it was for a purpose, and I knew I needed to surrender my rights, my frustrations, everything.....But I wasn't sure how. The process TAUGHT us how. I cannot explain it any other way. I couldn't have chosen it to be different. I had to learn it. Dave & I both had to learn it.<br /><br />This verse is explained so perfectly in a book that was recently given to us, called Brokenness, by Lon Solomon. He talks about the process of how God has to break us in order to use us - I mean FULLY use us. he quotes, "Our self-life and all of its out-workings - self-trust, self-reliance, self-wisdom, self-will - are the things that increase our resistance to the Holy Spirit's movement in and through our lives." Yes, this is what I want. Not just to tap into my own strength and be useful, but operate out of the power of the Holy Spirit because I have died to myself - my self-rights, my self-reliance, my self-will. I honestly don't know how anyone gets to that point without God breaking us. I could never choose to be so dependent on my own. That has always been my desire, but one day God just hit me with the truth that I was not, and I was powerless to be where He wanted me to be and I just desperately sought Him for the answers - often times wanting formulas. Another thing Lon Solomon talks about in his book is that God does not anoint programs, He anoints people. That really hit me too, because I'm always looking for formulas to make my situation better.<br /><br />He goes on to explain the verse in John 12. "A kernel of wheat with its hard outer shell intact is useless. The wheat cannot sprout and grow. There is life on the inside, but it cannot be released. However, when the wheat's hard outer shell is broken and cracked open, then the life of the wheat can come out and grow and bear fruit and bring blessing to its world. The real issue is not whether there is life inside the kernel of wheat but whether the life that is inside can get out and make an impact on the world around it. And this depends on whether its hard outer shell has been broken. Jesus points to this truth of nature and declares that it is the secret to bringing forth 'many seeds' for God. So, Jesus says, a Christ follower is just like a kernel of wheat. When we give our lives to Christ, the Holy Spirit takes up residence in our innermost being. Just like the kernel of wheat, we have the Spiritual life inside of us. But every one of us still has that hard outer shell of our self-life. The result is that the life and power of the Spirit of God can't get out - it can't flow through us. Just like physical seeds, God must break the hard outer shell of every Christ-follower so that the life of God can pulsate through us freely and spill out onto the world around us."<br /><br />One life he talks about is that of D.L.Moody. D.L.Moody was already in our eyes considered a great man of God before He was broken. It seemed He lived for Christ, but there were 2 older women that thought differently. They knew Moody was not living in the power of the Holy Spirit, and although he had a great love for God, most of what he did (they felt) was in his own strength. Oh that sounds so much like me. While Moody preached, they prayed. Moody did not get it - he thought their prayers should be directed towards the congregation and not him. But one day, the great fire of Chicago came and stripped Moody of everything. He found himself alone and devastated. but his spiritual hunger remained. Here, God brought Moody to the end of himself. Here, Moody suddenly saw how much of his work in Chicago had been propelled by his own energy, power, and drive. Here, Moody confessed that he had been like Moses in the early years of Moses' life. Here, quietly, Moody surrendered himself totally to God. Moody quotes, 'Before this, I was always tugging and carrying the water myself, Now I have a river that carries me!' " One thing that truly amazes me is that after this brokenness process happened for D.L.Moody he quotes, "I went to preaching again. The sermons were not different. I did not present any new truths and yet now thousands were converted...I would not now be placed back where I was before if you were to give me the world...It would be as the small dust of the balance." WOW! that strikes me hard as I am reminded that God does not anoint a formula but a person. I have often wondered why what I am doing is not working for me, even putting forth great effort. I am convinced now more than ever, to surrender my self to God. It is His plan, His agenda. The product of the process is so worth it!<br /><br />There is so much more from this book I would like to quote, but if any of this is resonating with where you are at in your journey I highly recommend getting this book.<br /><br />I pray that anyone who reads this blog, and is going through this brokenness process that you be encouraged! God's agenda is for us to be free, not feel the bondage we often do. So often we resist the things that God so wants to use to teach us - right down to the small stuff. It starts with the small stuff. If there is a circumstance in your life that you seem to run away from because it is too hard, maybe a relationship you avoid because it is too difficult, I would encourage you to pray hard before you make that choice. You may be missing out on living a Spirit filled life. So many choices I have had to make in my life were the more difficult choice, but I knew the product would be worth the process. And it so is! I have so far to go and I am excited to see what the Lord does next....<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);">Galatians 6:9</span><br /></span></span><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-17316857593288378782008-01-20T15:09:00.000-05:002008-01-23T10:30:33.404-05:00Somewhere in the Middle<span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br />Dave bought me the new Casting Crowns Cd for Christmas. It is awesome - they are my favorite! As I was in the van the other day (by myself which was unusual), I caught the chorus to one of the songs, called "somewhere in the Middle". It wasn't the first time I had heard the song, but for some reason the Chorus stuck out to me and I had to go back to the beginning to hear the whole thing again. The reason why this song was so awesome on that day was that it completely wrapped up all the thoughts I had been having over the past several weeks. What a battle my flesh and the Spirit within me were having.<br /><br />I'll backtrack a little. In several of my posts, I talked about surrender. The Lord has had this word on my heart for probably a few years now. I knew that there were things I needed to surrender to Him, but wasn't quite sure how. (I am sorry, I can feel a long post already - but then again, do I really know any other way to do it) : ) I could LITERALLY feel the battle within. the Bible talks about this battle in </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Ephesians 6:12</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br />I felt this battle going on inside, and if you have never felt it, it is completely overwhelming. Your mind cannot rest. Your soul cannot know peace. Your heart cannot know joy. That frustrated me because if I do not feel rest, joy and peace, then there is something wrong in my Christian journey. The Lord promises only these things. He does not promise life to be easy but He promises peace and joy. I felt in bondage to something I could not figure out. I know the lord disciplines those He loves as He says in </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Hebrews </span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >and I count it joy to know that I am one of His, that He loves me enough TO discipline me. I know all hardship is for a purpose, so I embrace hardship. I don't question God for the whys I just accept there is a reason. One particular area that I felt in bondage to was in my parenting. particularly with David, as there are still so many behavioral issues to work on. This has been an area of struggle for over 10 years. Yes he is getting better and I am getting better but there was still a missing ingredient I was not getting.<br /><br />Back about 2 years ago, I e-mailed my sister who was living in Ecuador at the time. I shared my heart with her as to how I was feeling. I felt at that point in my life, I had known Spiritual growth, I had known God better than I had ever know Him. My desire to know Him and please Him was at a place it had never been all my life. yet there was something more. I knew the Lord was working in my life; I saw the places He was working and I felt His presence so many times. he gave me comfort during times no one else can, and spoke so clearly through His Word on so many occasions. Yet there was still something missing - I knew there was something missing. I shared with my sister how I knew what I was missing was the </span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Power</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > of the Holy Spirit. I knew the Spirit lived within me, but I did not feel I was moving in the </span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >power</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > of the Spirit. I felt so many things I was doing was in my own strength. As I type this, I am rejoicing over those tough times where I sat and cried, as it was because of those times that brought me to where I am today.<br /><br />As I continued in the Word, to get to know God - the only thing I knew to do, I kept sensing the same thing from God. Over and over it came up. I know I have a post on this somewhere, but I kept hearing the Lord tell me to sow to the Spirit if I want to reap from the Spirit. While all along I would continue to question what I was doing wrong that resulted in the frustration that I felt in my heart over these issues I felt I had no control over. I wanted so badly to reap form the Spirit and did not know how to get there - how to surrender myself so the Spirit could work through me. I cannot tell you how many times in my quiet times in the mornings I just camped in Galatians. The one verse that jumped out at me every time was </span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Galatians 3:1-3</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >You foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you? Before your very eyes Jesus Christ was clearly portrayed as crucified. </span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" id="en-NIV-29089" class="sup" >2</span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >I would like to learn just one thing from you: Did you receive the Spirit by observing the law, or by believing what you heard? </span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" id="en-NIV-29090" class="sup" >3</span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br />As I took this seriously and continued to sow to the Spirit (by prayer, reading the Word, and making choices that would invest in eternity as opposed to the world), I continued to ask myself the question (at times) "What am I doing wrong?" It wasn't everyday and it was oh, so subtle. It usually popped up in the area of parenting because, well, when you have a child with a disability of some sort, the problem doesn't seem to really fade that much on a day to day. You have good days and bad ones. You can even have more good ones than bad ones, which is how it was for so long. But that nagging in the heart that tells me on those bad days, my responses are only getting better because the circumstance is getting better. I learned not to be so angry, so I guess I looked at that as growth, but I still did not fell </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >free</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > from the anger altogether. I wanted to be free. I wanted to </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >enjoy </span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >homeschooling as opposed to just saying "This is what I am called to do, so I'll do it until God leads me elsewhere." I did not have joy in homeschooling. I wanted joy in homeschooling.<br /><br />Over the past year, another struggle became very apparent to us and that was in the area of finances. We've had our struggles but we always pulled through. We had bad weeks and good weeks. The only debt we ever incurred was due to our own mistakes. It was never an issue of lack of provision on God's part. When we went through those periods of struggle we accepted that as the Lord's discipline and once again looked at "What we are doing wrong" and try to "Work on it". Well for the first time we have gone through a season where things did not seem to be "Working out". For awhile it was so easy to trust God, and simply say, "We'll catch up - God will provide". But the provision wasn't there. Week after week, we would not receive a paycheck. Week after week we would borrow from one bank to pay another. Shifted debt. Is this the Lord's plan? "What are we doing wrong?" The question would eventually come. We have known hardship so we don't get bent out of shape easily, but one year of struggling and going into debt was starting to get annoying.<br /><br />About a month or so ago, as I was praying, I literally wept with joy as I realized for the very first time in my life I wanted to </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >know God </span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >more than I wanted something from Him. That was good - that was a good place to be. I felt I was learning a big lesson here. Almost a kind of "Surrender" I felt in my heart. That I didn't need to worry or control the money thing because God had bigger things for me to learn. Maybe I felt at that time the money would come. Maybe I learned the lesson God wanted to teach me. But I didn't. The money still did not come, and debt continued to incur. I kep thinking "Is this really God's will? I don't think God really wants us to be in debt. I think He wants to provide for us. So we MUST not be getting something here."<br /><br />Last Friday morning I woke up at 5am (I normally go walking with my neighbor at 5:30, but chose not to that morning because we were going out of town that day and needed the rest for the long drive). I felt awake, so I thought I would go to the computer and see if we got a paycheck. We did, but it was $160.00. The week before was $4.24, the week before $100.00 and such has been the pattern for awhile, with a big check every once in a while. So that morning, I kind of had my own little meltdown. I was so frustrated with not being able to have money to pay our bills each week and shifting debt. I cried and prayed and cried some more. Finally I decided my anxiety was not very beneficial so I would stop thinking about it and go back to sleep. I did. When I woke up again I had a flood of thoughts and I felt the urgency to spend some time with the Lord and journal, but I did not have time. The boys needed to be home schooled, I needed to pack for our trip and leave our house by 1:30.<br /><br />Our trip was just an overnight field trip with the boys to Sea World in Orlando, so we came back the next day. On the way home, I had an incident with David that really made me angry. I confessed my feelings to my friend who was in the car with me. I was even more frustrated with myself for the way I was feeling </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >towards</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > David.<br /><br />The next morning I asked Dave to take the boys to church so I could have some time alone to pray and journal. I knew the Lord had given me thoughts on that Friday morning and I knew I needed to meditate on them, but I honestly couldn't remember what they were. So I began with prayer, and then just started journaling asking the lord to reveal as I write, what He wanted me to know. I wrote </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >TWENTY SIX</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > pages in my journal that morning. I don't journal often, and I never journal that much, but God had some things for me to see. As I wrote, the Lord reminded me of some things I had been reading in a book that Dave bought me for Christmas called </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >"Dangerous Surrender"</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > by Kay Warren. Just not to reiterate what I already wrote in our January newsletter,(If you don't receive our newsletter you can get it from our website on the side bar, "Cooke Family Website") the abbreviated version is that God convicted me of my legalistic view, that some how I can incur His blessings based on my performance. He reminded me that when I say things like "What am I doing wrong", the focus is still on myself and not on Him. Isn't that what I learned from the verses in Galatians? But I didn't think I can earn my salvation, but my actions were proving that I thought I could earn His blessings.<br /><br />What God wanted was my heart. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I had taken up my cross, and I had followed Christ, but I had not denied myself, in many areas. Even the motives of my heart were exposed. So much of what I do is wrapped up in what others think and I didn't even realize it. I allowed myself to be burdened by others thoughts, ideas and opinions without even being aware of it. When someone would give their opinion of someone else's parenting, blaming the parents for there children's behaviors, I would feel more pressure. The problem with me is this is how my flesh thinks. So as the Spirit began to work and steer me away from this thinking, I could go right back to it with one simple comment from someone else. I knew it was not right, but then you get with people you respect, and they feel the same way my flesh does and I pick those thoughts back up again. I felt I was on the verge of surrendering this area for some time, but was afraid that I would appear to be not doing my part somehow. What would others think?<br /><br />This Friday morning, for the first time in my life, I felt I surrendered these areas to the Lord in the only way I knew how. My first commitment was to deny myself, second was to take up my cross (to embrace my circumstances, not just accept them) and follow Jesus. My prayer was, "Lord that is all I have to offer you and I pray it is an acceptable sacrifice." I actually even wrote in my journal that I was not fully convinced that what I was doing was right, but I knew since these thoughts kept coming up, that I must try this route. The other way was not working for me, so I will give it up, and knew if I was not on the right path, that the Lord would steer me back on course.<br /><br />So as I am driving in my car the other day, I hear the chorus to this Casting Crowns song, and it hits me again like a ton of bricks:<br /><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender without losing all control...<br /><br /></span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >I went back to listen to the whole song again. It so summarized how I have been living my life.<br /><br /><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between the hot and the cold</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between the new and the old</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between who I am and who I used to be</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere in the middle, You'll find me</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span> <span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between the wrong and the right</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between the darkness and the light</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between who I was and who You're making me</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere in the middle, You'll find me</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span> <span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender without losing all control</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span> <span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Fearless warriors in a picket fence, reckless abandon wrapped in common sense</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Deep water faith in the shallow end and we are caught in the middle</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > With eyes wide open to the differences, the God we want and the God who is</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > But will we trade our dreams for His or are we caught in the middle</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Are we caught in the middle</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span> <span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between my heart and my hands</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between my faith and my plans</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between the safety of the boat and the crashing waves</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span> <span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between a whisper and a roar</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between the altar and the door</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere between contented peace and always wanting more</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Somewhere in the middle You'll find me</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span> <span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender without losing all control</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /></span> <span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Lord, I feel You in this place and I know You're by my side</span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > Loving me even on these nights when I'm caught in the middle</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br />Wow! that is how I have lived my life. Somewhere in the middle. i always wanted to be sold out for the Lord. that is my hearts desire. But I was so caught up in a legalistic mindset. And if I wasn't fully convinced of my surrender last Sunday, I am today. Not only did this song confirm that "My efforts" were just a way to keep control, I went to a women's conference Fri. eve. & Sat. that confirmed everything so beautifully. I would love to write more on the conference, but I will save that for another post - I think this one is long enough.<br /><br />In the past couple of journal entries I have written, I have mentioned how I can taste Freedom. Today I can honestly say, I </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >feel</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > freedom. How can you feel freedom when you've lost all control? I fully admit I don't have a clue in so many areas, and I thought having the answers proved my maturity somehow. If not having answers makes me immature, then that is what I am. But I feel free. And I believe that is how God wants me to feel. I actually feel </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >more </span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >energized to serve Him, and more </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >equipped</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" > to serve Him, because now, I no longer rely on the resources that </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >I </span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >have, but on what He does through me. This next verse will remain my motto for awhile.<br /><br /><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Galatians 5:1</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /></span><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);">Oh, Lord, I am overwhelmed by your grace. it is so hard for my sinful flesh to accept that you love me like you do, and expect no duty to perform any task to earn anything from you. What a gift. All you ask for is me. I give you all I've got. Do in me, what only you can do!<br /><br />To the God of grace who is able to keep me from falling........<br /></span></span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><br /><br /><br /></span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-31848561763081812652008-01-10T12:40:00.001-05:002008-12-10T04:07:40.397-05:00Live Nativity<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlAWrBA88PRUJyjpD5-sHJjtgvYZtQoQ81CTKsAGRZfHCZnHjpjtDrTIte3MD7NNwh9KGz6IIlxNjy2OKAm284tZgBRXLcHtbqh_wGfOq1yER-V95Mz1-tB4fmkYwMks37PN8T2XYVMSg/s1600-h/101_0762.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlAWrBA88PRUJyjpD5-sHJjtgvYZtQoQ81CTKsAGRZfHCZnHjpjtDrTIte3MD7NNwh9KGz6IIlxNjy2OKAm284tZgBRXLcHtbqh_wGfOq1yER-V95Mz1-tB4fmkYwMks37PN8T2XYVMSg/s320/101_0762.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153907484356118146" border="0" /></a><br /><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >Since our website is not allowing us to add pictures for some reason, I am putting them on the blog for now. The following are pictures from the "Live Nativity" that our family did for Cornerstone Kitchens. (I couldn't figure out how to get the top picture below the others....but it's cute enough to be on top). That is my nephew Caden. He really wasn't supposed to be baby Jesus, but he just happened to fall asleep so we "placed him in the manger". : ) More pictures to come....</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ6nYkMGa5Xk5x08nrB2usHpsni1uIrevX9LstEYU10ihwrO75stucLUBKLKnoS9UQMboJiux1wl1q01BQdqYJC2IoEmHKAbzRnxoFcZFsrN5YByMknsBlGQH7UQY0Eh_HcGRd2AYigIk/s1600-h/101_0748.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ6nYkMGa5Xk5x08nrB2usHpsni1uIrevX9LstEYU10ihwrO75stucLUBKLKnoS9UQMboJiux1wl1q01BQdqYJC2IoEmHKAbzRnxoFcZFsrN5YByMknsBlGQH7UQY0Eh_HcGRd2AYigIk/s320/101_0748.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153907157938603618" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ-41GeWtDxa4eFc8HJI88vha2NRq61E6gM9H6DTk_OSyGTFuEmhdhv0MjKCiC5eJU6fYq3CN6hw2yB_T4MOBMh4XDtoO_kbV8NuoDZXiOZELfeLj_YUdgoWWOWFV4hB-RlPvvT9cSxfE/s1600-h/101_0740.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ-41GeWtDxa4eFc8HJI88vha2NRq61E6gM9H6DTk_OSyGTFuEmhdhv0MjKCiC5eJU6fYq3CN6hw2yB_T4MOBMh4XDtoO_kbV8NuoDZXiOZELfeLj_YUdgoWWOWFV4hB-RlPvvT9cSxfE/s320/101_0740.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153906152916256322" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgq_Y03o2Xl76smvd1HMtPzxIYkG3_IjkqVLpNNF7NZozqY5U9WMQafGLEqcnV2Q3vjSjOVMvUxtcbBVJoJcAW75n6LOhvkKbJIXqTJ1XoAWeT9S4CVpDgcr1WfdqXFN-gxIfvonW8rAMs/s1600-h/101_0750.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgq_Y03o2Xl76smvd1HMtPzxIYkG3_IjkqVLpNNF7NZozqY5U9WMQafGLEqcnV2Q3vjSjOVMvUxtcbBVJoJcAW75n6LOhvkKbJIXqTJ1XoAWeT9S4CVpDgcr1WfdqXFN-gxIfvonW8rAMs/s320/101_0750.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153905933872924210" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwQiDb_TvHJ8BymnoZSRWkhTCzo3JxpiNoyjFwO8IRFwNtS-MG_6Im0sTbm8iccpnYU1jgRJLHP1-IXyez0kh4kanbnBTXPp4HxfR9GPq1h-TJ6zYBMWLeu8V4iWqEcXp_W2IvRSJcEsY/s1600-h/101_0749.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwQiDb_TvHJ8BymnoZSRWkhTCzo3JxpiNoyjFwO8IRFwNtS-MG_6Im0sTbm8iccpnYU1jgRJLHP1-IXyez0kh4kanbnBTXPp4HxfR9GPq1h-TJ6zYBMWLeu8V4iWqEcXp_W2IvRSJcEsY/s320/101_0749.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153905693354755618" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfU8P1MKEFfRQTW_dTjbUDk_ceiuxoB9VSPrMiYqgWBPm5TmZMjqTehb59_c-2bT9kUGNpQo1w84ASkWVGCWAfl1LOdsAqUk6VSj9qgifMvibYrY9hZ1LayFHK1ETNmuWfeL35BW3mhV4/s1600-h/101_0745.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfU8P1MKEFfRQTW_dTjbUDk_ceiuxoB9VSPrMiYqgWBPm5TmZMjqTehb59_c-2bT9kUGNpQo1w84ASkWVGCWAfl1LOdsAqUk6VSj9qgifMvibYrY9hZ1LayFHK1ETNmuWfeL35BW3mhV4/s320/101_0745.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153904331850122754" border="0" /></a>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-53638358274231208682007-12-20T12:06:00.000-05:002007-12-22T23:10:09.594-05:00Updates<span style=";font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" >Sorry we are so bad at posting new blogs. I just posted a bunch of pictures on our website (you can click on it from the side bar). We will post some more soon of pictures from the live Nativity that our family did last Saturday and again this coming Saturday. Samuel was the cutest Shepherd ever! Speaking of Samuel, he is at my side right now, determined to read EVERY <span style="font-style: italic;">Community Chest</span> card and <span style="font-style: italic;">Chance</span> card form the <span style="font-style: italic;">Monopoly</span> game. He actually can read most of the words. I am just impressed that he can endure a whole game of Monopoly on his own. Sometimes, he wants to quit (especially when he loses, which is every time), but we don't let him, and he continues to want to play with his brothers. He's learning good math skills as well, as he counts his money, which makes me feel better since we gave them the month of December off from school. Can you call it school if they are reading and doing math and learning all about the real estate world? : ) It just makes me feel better to think that. We decided that things were getting a bit crazy around here, so we thought a break would be good for all of us, and work on some character issues and have some fun together.<br /><br />After our vacation to NC (we leave Christmas Day), we will come back and hit the ground running again. It has been a good month for reflecting - especially my trip to NY last week. I SO needed that and the Lord opened my eyes to see some things that I needed to see. I will also post pictures from that trip as well. I have to wait for Dave to put them on the computer because I don't know how to do that part. : )<br /><br />Blessings to you all and pray you have a Merry Christmas! May Christ be truly honored in your lives this Holiday season...<br /><br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-29512530615317553442007-11-27T09:17:00.000-05:002007-11-27T10:50:05.439-05:00Giving Thanks<span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >We just returned home from Dave's parents in North Carolina. I don't know what it is, but every time we go there, we just have a great time - and we pretty much just relax. Dave's parents are so great, and after hearing some thanksgiving stories of my friends and family, I am SO thankful for my in-laws. We can't wait to go back on Christmas day to see the rest of the family. Our boys are looking forward to it almost as much as we are. : )<br /><br />We began a couple of new traditions this year for Thanksgiving, and prayerfully will do similar things for all the holidays. We seem to get so caught up in the preparations FOR the holiday that we often skip the PURPOSE of the holiday. We really want to make memories for our kids to truly embrace the meaning of WHY we celebrate these holidays. We got a few ides from the FamilyLife website. We purchased the Thanksgiving book by Barbara Rainey that explains the whole story of the pilgrims and read it to the boys over the course of a few days (I think I was sleeping in elementary school when we learned all that, because other than the pilgrim's coming over on the Mayflower, I did not know a whole lot. And while Dave was reading, I was the only one asking questions) : ) One thing we did was had the boys trace their hand on a piece of paper and Dave made a turkey out of it. Then we wrote 5 things (one on each finger) we were thankful for, for each person that would be around the table. The boys colored them and then we matted them and had them laminated for place mats (I will put pictures on our website soon). It was a great exercise and helps us to appreciate even those we don't know so well. Another thing we did, was we all wrote 5 things we were thankful for on an index card before dinner. We had 5 kernels of corn on each plate (a reminder of the daily rations that the pilgrim's had to live on) and as we passed a basket each person would drop a kernel of corn and say one thing they were thankful for. The basket went around 5 times. It was great to hear 65 different things of gratitude. I loved hearing my boys being thankful for Jesus.<br /><br />At this time, I am thankful for so many things. One thing is in response to the last post. God has really been stretching us in the area of finances, and we have learned to live on less rations as well. Not nearly where the pilgrims were, so that made me extremely grateful as we read their story. Our boys have been aware of the struggle because there has been many times we had to say no to things because we could not spend the money. I think this has been the best thing for all of us - I think it has really developed a attitude of gratitude in all of us. I will explain: The Friday before we left for NC, we received a very large paycheck. It was enough to pay back the 2 weeks we were behind and pay the all the bills for the week. There was extra money as well. Oh the temptation to want to go out and celebrate. But instead, we thought it wise to fund the envelopes for the rest of our bills for the month, which we were able to do. What a blessing that was! While we were away, Dave received another paycheck,and since our bills were already paid for the month, we decided to put money in an envelope for Christmas.<br /><br />Our plans for Christmas this year is to go to the Children's Home on Christmas morning and spend the day with the 7 children in the Foster home. Ever since we began the tradition of either going to South America for Christmas to the give Christmas to the kids, or just sending them gifts, we all (my whole extended family) want to somehow keep up with that type of tradition. My sister is organizing it and got a list of things that the home needs. The other night, I told my boys that we had set a certain amount of money aside for Christmas for them. I asked them if they wanted us to buy them gifts or use it for the kids in the home. Without giving it one thought, they said, "Give it to the kids, we don't need anything." I thought that was awesome, but didn't know if they were just trying to say the right thing. So I said, "Let's just say that mommy and daddy were going to buy you a <span style="font-style: italic;">Wii </span>(the video game system they really want) for Christmas, would you still make the same decision?" David and Jonathan both said that although that makes it harder, they felt in their heart, that we should give it to the kids. I could not have felt prouder of them. In spite of our sin and selfishness, God continues to work in the hearts of our boys and it humbles me. I WOULD NOT have made that choice if I were them. And I take no credit for the decision they made.<br /><br />So we decided to go shopping yesterday for some items on the list and the boys helped pick out the stuff. We were looking for a good family movie to buy for the home, and we came across the shelf of Christmas movies. I picked up a Dennis The Mennis Christmas movie and said, "Oh that looks cute." Jonathan said, "Mommy we didn't come here to shop for us" (something I had said to Samuel several times already). David replied, "Jonathan, mommy can buy us a movie if she wants to." In which Jonathan said, "We don't need it, we have enough stuff." So needless to say, I put it back.<br /><br />You know, sometimes I feel so inadequate as a parent and wonder if I am really pleasing God with the raising of my children. Sometimes, particularly with David, I feel so out of my league with how to teach and train him. I am still trying to figure out what "Surrender" really means in the area of parenting. Sometimes I feel like Job when his friends had a lot of opinions about why he was suffering, only I actually believe them. It is a difficult battle to simply trust God with your life, instead of trying to control it. I used to be so prideful before I had children. I thought I had all the answers. Now I feel like I don't have any, and it is often overwhelming. I know the Lord had pierced my heart in this area, and I still have so much to learn. I can feel the battle within. My flesh still wants to fight against what I believe the Lord is trying to teach me. I still want to control because somehow I still feel it is a reflection of me. I think God is more concerned about HIS reflection. I think too many times in the past I have made myself believe that the things I did and the choices I made was to reflect Christ when ultimately I just wanted to look good to others. God knows as well as I do, that my prideful thoughts and actions do not reflect Him in any way, as much as I may want to convince myself that they do. As long as I can hold it together on the outside, that will reflect God. I know better. That is what God has been teaching me. It is my heart He wants. And if my outward appearance looks foolish for awhile, while He gives me a heart transplant, over time, the outside will come.<br /><br />I think journaling this story of my kids has helped me to see that this is just one example of what God can do when I surrender to Him. He was working when I wasn't even aware. All the worrying that I do about my parenting is so futile. I guess I thought of surrender as doing nothing. But it is not doing nothing. It is keeping a vibrant, active relationship with Jesus, and watching for when His Spirit moves in me and THEN act on it. So often I move before He does. It goes against my personality to sit back and do nothing. But I am still learning. I want nothing more than for my boys to know and love the Lord with all their heart, and the only good parent that can teach them that is God. I am the vessel He chose to use to teach them, so my job is to listen to what He tells me to do. If I am not actively seeking Him and listening, I will miss it and be found guilty of complacency and laziness. If you have a personality like mine, you understand. If you have a tendency toward complacency, you will accuse me of being too hard on myself. And I am often guilty of that. However, I feel the Lord is wanting to lift that burden off of me by asking me to simply seek His face and listen...<br /><br />There is much gratitude in my heart today for the Lord and His tender mercy toward me. I am so unworthy of His love and grace. I have so far to go and I am thankful for His love and that He accepts me as I am, but loves me too much to keep me that way. His standards are high, but He never intended for me to meet them in my own strength.<br /><br />I pray that I will never settle for anything less than holiness, and that I seek His face moment by moment and that the Holy Spirit will guide me through the center of God's perfect will for my life.<br /><br />To the one who is able to keep me from falling......<br /><br /><br /><br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-24383490683750242922007-11-02T12:48:00.001-04:002007-11-02T20:39:37.211-04:00God is good!<span style=";font-family:arial;font-size:130%;" >I know that title sounds so churchy - something someone would say when things go the way they want them to. But how about when things don't go the way we want them to? It is not as easy to say that God is good. Why is it so hard to see and know and feel God's goodness when we are hurting?<br /><br />So many times in the past, I found myself praying so much harder in times of need. Deep down in my heart, I really did want to know God, but at that moment I was more desperate for His answers than simply just to know Him. It was a difficult transition from praying for God to move on my behalf, to just simply knowing Him. It's easier said than done, when you have a sick child, or you were thrown into a situation that you have no clue how to handle, or you have bills to pay and the money is not there. God has given us a greater revelation of Himself through all these difficult times. The message we continued to hear was how we needed to surrender ourselves to Him. HOW to surrender was the question. How do you lay your burdens at the foot of the cross and leave them there - without the temptation to pick them back up again?<br /><br />I say all that background to get to this point. When it came to finances (with Dave working on commission most of his 11 years at Cornerstone), we have been desperate at times, but at worst, we MAYBE went a week or two without a paycheck. During that 11 years, Dave left Cornerstone to start his own business. This year was probably the most difficult financially (as we went $14,000.00 into debt), yet Spiritually, it was the best of our married years. God taught us so much that year, but interestingly, being a good steward wasn't one of them. When I say being a good steward, I do not mean just living within our means, but seeing everything that we own as belonging to God. We said it all belonged to God, but lived as if it belonged to us. It wasn't until now, that we are truly understanding that it all belongs to God.<br /><br />Over the past few months, as paychecks have been slim to none, we have questioned God's provision. I began to wonder if God supplies all our needs, than what was the reason we did not have enough money to pay our bills. We prayed for provision, but did not see it coming in. Not once did we think God was not doing His part, but questioned what WE may have been doing wrong. God is a keeper of His Word, and if He says He will provide, then He will.<br /><br />A few months ago I decided to look back at our past 6 months of paychecks. I realized that had we been living as tightly as we were for the past couple of months, we actually would be pretty close to on target to pay all our bills. This made us realize that only God knows what things we need to prepare for (like an economy crash), and we cannot live like it belongs to us. I don't know about others, but we don't usually prepare for a crisis.<br /><br />A few weeks ago, as I was having my time with the Lord one morning, I began to pray that the Lord would provide a paycheck that week. (At that point we had gone 5 out of 7 weeks without one). It seemed that my desperateness for a paycheck was not what it was in the past, even though times were more desperate now. The reason why is because we felt God was refining our hearts SO much in this area, that I feared that getting a paycheck would send us back into our old ways. I wanted this mindset to stick. I know this may sound strange to some, but God had so much more to teach us. I remember just crying before the Lord that day, with joy, because I felt for the first time of ever coming before the Lord with any kind of desperateness, that my desire to KNOW HIM, was greater than my desire to receive something FROM Him. I felt a peace in my heart, as God reminded me of the story of Jeremiah and how He is the re-builder of ancient ruins. God put my heart to rest, that although we may struggle a little more in the area of finances, and maybe even go more into debt, that in His perfect timing He will repay it all back.<br /><br />There was a time in my life I would never have wanted to share any of this (Pride). But I wanted to share this story on the other side of a miracle. After God works it all out, it is so much easier to share the story. But today, God is still God, and we KNOW He will provide. Not in the way we thought, but the lessons learned will be worth the wait. When we were financially stable, we missed so much of a hurting, dying world. We were so selfish with how we spent our money. We helped others and gave whenever we saw a need, but never did we sacrifice ourselves in order to give. God has truly humbled us during this time - especially through those who DO sacrifice to give. As we began raising support for full time ministry, we have seen so many things concerning finances. Many people are struggling financially more than ever due to the economy, yet we can see sacrifice on the part of so many.<br /><br />There is so much more on this topic, but for sake of time I will end with this sweet story:<br /><br />We have a precious, 78 year old woman, living in a trailer, on Social Security on our support team. She is my mentor and friend. She has been a constant source of love and encouragement in my life and honors God with how she lives her life. A few months ago, she sent us a check in the mail, saying she would pledge a certain amount monthly as long as she could afford to do it. Every month may be different, but she would try to send something. We noticed the past two months that she was sending multiple checks, and this month we received three. Knowing how little she has, I called her today to make she she understood what was going on. She had no idea this happened. She said she just writes a check every time she gets an envelope in the mail. She did not realize an envelope is immediately mailed once a check is received. At first she was concerned because she thought a check may bounce because she does not have that kind of money. Once she realized her checkbook was fine and nothing had bounced she said, "You know sweetheart, every time I write a check, I say, 'Lord, I wish I could give them so much more', and so God went ahead and did it for me."<br /><br />I am so humbled by this precious woman of God, who financially had nothing her whole life and raised two children on her own who grew to know and love the Lord. As she lives the last years of her life she will never regret not having nice things, or think of all the vacations she could have gone on. God has truly provided every thing she has needed and the legacy of faith she leaves to so many, not just her own children, is something you cannot place a dollar on.<br /><br />I pray I never lose sight of the reality that God has so much more to offer just by knowing Him, than any amount of money, friends, family or health. Knowing Him is truly the greatest blessing I can have. There is no greater joy than having a revelation of who God is and what He wants to show me in my life. It has been so fun to watch Him work in my husband and my boys as well.<br /><br />Back in June, I posted this poem by Beth Moore. Rather than going back and finding it again, I pasted it here, because I think it so so appropriate for the topic. It just encourages me to keep trusting.</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:180%;" >The Life I Planned</span><span style="font-size:130%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:130%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:130%;"></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Has someone seen the life I planned?</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >It seems it's been replaced</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I've looked in every corner</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >It's lost without a trace</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I've found one I don't recognize</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Things missing that were dear</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Promises I'd hope to keep</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >And dreams I'd dreamed aren't here</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Faces I had planned to see</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Hands I planned to hold</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Now absent in the pictures</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Not the way I told.</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Has someone seen the life I planned?</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Did it get thrown away?</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >God took my hand from searching</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Then I heard Him say</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >"Child, your ears have never heard</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Your eyes have never seen</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Eternal plans I have for you</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Are more than you can dream."</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >"You long to walk by sight</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >But I'm teaching eyes to see.</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I know what I am doing</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >'Til then, you must believe."</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >He's done so much, I felt ashamed</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >To know He heard my moans</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >To think I'd trade in all he's done</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >For plans made on my own.</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I wept over His faithfulness</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >And how He'd proved Himself</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >How He'd gone beyond my dreams</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >And said to Him myself,</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >"No, my ears have never heard</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >My eyes have never seen</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Eternal plans you have for me</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >And more than I could dream."</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >"Yes, I long to walk by sight</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >But you're teaching eyes to see</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >You know what you are doing</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >'Til then, I must believe."</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I felt His great compassion</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Mercy unrestrained</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >He let me mourn my losses</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >And showed to me my gains</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I offered Him my future</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >And released to Him my past</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I traded in my dreams</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >For a plan He said would last.</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >I get no glimpse ahead</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >No certainties at all</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Except the presence of the One</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Who will never let me fall.</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Are you also searching</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >For a life you planned yourself?</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Have you looked in every corner?</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Have you checked on every shelf?</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Child, your ears have never heard</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Your eyes have never seen</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Eternal plans I have for you</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >And more than you can dream.</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Perhaps you long to walk by faith</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >But He's teaching eyes to see</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >He knows what He is doing</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" >Child, step out and believe.</span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /><span style=";font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-style: italic;">"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-style: italic;">God has prepared for those who love Him."</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ></span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-family:verdana;font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">1 Corinthians 2:9</span></span></span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></div>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-22668501872897063562007-10-07T07:02:00.000-04:002007-10-07T07:16:54.289-04:00Our New Website<span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" >We have finally set up our website. There is still much work to be done, but it is up. You can go to it at www.cooke.ministryhome.org . We will add a link to the side bar as well.<br /><br />I am sorry I have not posted anything new in awhile (there was a request) : ) I will have to say that we have been learning much through this process but for me, some of it is so personal it literally is painful at times. In a good way, but almost embarrassing. God continues to refine my heart and I see sin that I have never seen before. Sometimes I want to look at others and say, "But God what about them?" I feel JUST LIKE MY BOYS WHEN I DO THAT. They are constantly pointing the finger at one of their brothers when they get caught arguing with each other. I will say this: This battle that I am going through spiritually is learning how to love others. And not just be kind to them or even to overlook offenses ( I'm getting really good at that) : ) But to love like Jesus loves; To see people the way Jesus sees them. Jesus loves unconditionally and when He was offended and spit upon and beaten, He loved. Enough to die for them. He had compassion and went out of His way to love. He had mercy. He had NO pride. Love is not selfish and I am learning that. I will end there and share more about that in the future. Dave has been saying forever, that he wants to post something but he is SO busy with work and raising support, he doesn't have much time. I'll get him to post something soon though.<br /><br />If you are a regular visitor (or even a new visitor), we love to read your comments. It always encourages us to hear from you.<br /><br />Blessings to you all.....<br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-35529323789750833252007-09-21T21:54:00.000-04:002007-09-21T23:19:02.667-04:00Challenged to LIVE IT!<span style=";font-family:arial;font-size:130%;" >I have been wanting to post something about my trip to see my friend in Illinois, and life just seems to fly by so fast. That whole trip went by TOO fast. I already want to plan the next one, but I don't think it will happen until after we move. : (<br /><br />On the way home from the conference (we had a 6 hour drive), my friend asked me what was the one thing I took away from the conference. Ya know, I can say the conference was absolutely awesome and we had a great time, but not one thing that was said really stuck out to me. That is not usual for me. Some really great things were said, and I took lots of notes, but typically I will have at least one thing I feel challenged about, and I really didn't.<br /><br />I had several convictions during the conference but really none were about what the speakers said. As I sat there to think about my friends question, the answer came to me about what I was going to take home with me. I will have to backtrack though.....<br /><br />When we arrived at the conference center in Nashville, it was exactly 7:00pm, the time the conference started so we were hurrying to get in. On our way in, we saw a homeless man with a white Styrofoam cup asking for money. We stopped and my friend put some money in his cup (she always has the cash) : ) We talked to him for a couple of minutes and then he asked us if we would pray for him. We asked him his name and said of course we would. He said, "No, will you pray for me right now?" So we bowed and prayed for him right there. During the prayer, he kept saying "Thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus." We shared a few more words and then went inside. As we entered the building, I just felt like a hypocrite. Here we are going into this "Christian" conference and ignoring this man on the street. We didn't even ask him if he knew Jesus. My friend asked if I wanted to go back out and I said yes. So we went and found Bill. My friend did ask Bill if he knew Jesus and he said, "Yes, I walked faithfully with the Lord for 6 years." When we asked him what happened he just responded, "I made some bad choices." This man sat and quoted scripture to us, AND encouraged US. We got to encourage him as well, and he felt so blessed and thanked us for taking the time to stop and listen.<br /><br />Another thing that happened during the conference was at lunch time. After walking the streets of Nashville for 30 minutes trying to find a place to eat lunch (with 20,000 other women), we decided to just back to the conference center to eat there. We ended up waiting on line for an hour and a half! It wasn't the waiting that got me frustrated, it was the lady behind me that was complaining about others cutting the line while she continued to push her way in front of us; And it was the man behind the counter who obviously didn't have any respect for OUR time as he took HIS time taking TEN minutes to get ONE dish of nachos! Granted, this frustration was all inside, and people would not have known it.<br /><br />The last incident I will mention, is a couple of hours later I received a very discouraging phone call that really got me down. We have received some opposition about being in ministry, but this one person in particular has just hit me hard. It bothered me that my joy was robbed, and I had to refocus myself.<br /><br />Now there really is something in common with these three scenarios. I didn't really think of it until my friend asked me what I was going to take home from the conference. A couple of posts ago, I mentioned this recurring theme of events that continues to happen in my life lately and that God is definitely up to teaching me something. Well, these situations just add to it. The bottom line is that God is refining my heart. I cannot tell you how many times I think I am justified by my actions and God asks me about the attitude of my heart.<br /><br />In a nutshell this is what I told my friend. "I don't think God wants to fill me with any more knowledge of Him until I can live out the knowledge I already have. I am challenged to LIVE church not just play church. I think in essence that is what we are doing when we pass a homeless guy on the street and walk proudly into a women's conference, raise your hands in worship to the Lord, and then quickly get aggravated with a girl because she is trying to cut the line. And I allowed Satan to steal my joy with a phone call, because I care too much about myself and not about bringing glory to God."<br /><br />Ultimately I DO want to bring glory to God, and I am thankful that God is teaching me how prideful I am. Over the past few months, He continues to whisper in my ear, "You are so prideful." I argue a little, because I am trying to understand why I do not have ANY rights to be upset over these situations, especially the one regarding the phone call. This is a particularly difficult area for me NOT to hold onto my rights because it is SO hurtful. I feel God has humbled me so much already and one day I just heard Him say, "You are are on your knees, but I want you on your face." I just sat and cried, because I knew exactly what He meant and I saw how I was trying to hold onto those rights, and He only wants me to be free to worship and trust Him, regardless of those hurts. But the difficulty in all this for me, is that I am not just required to overlook this offense, but God is calling me to love. This relationship will not go away, and every time a dagger is thrown, I have to hold up my shield of faith, deflect it, and turn around and love! If I am honest, I will say this is not easy. But I DO see the blessing of being free to love those who hurt you. My friend asked me how we choose to be broken. My answer in my limited knowledge is we don't. We learn to be broken. God chooses the circumstances to break us. We can then choose to recognize the area of sin and repent, or we can ignore it.<br /><br />As I have been on this process of sowing to the Spirit and keeping short accounts with God, I have felt the Spirit flow through my life like never before. A friend asked me the other night how I define joy. Again, in my limited knowledge, it is being able to have hope in God because you know He is in control. Even in the midst of hardship and tears flowing, joy is being able to lift my hands in worship because of who HE is, not because of what my circumstance is. I am experiencing joy in that way like I never have before. It is because God is refining my heart~to look like His. And His heart is so perfect, so it is a painful process to be called on so many accounts. I am just in awe of how determined He is to make my heart look like His. And He has always wanted that for me, I was just not willing to fully surrender ALL my rights to Him. It is so not worth sacrificing the power of the Holy Spirit in my life, so I can get to a conference on time, or be sure I keep my place in line, or to be determined to not let myself be hurt by another.<br /><br />So that is what I take home from the conference. No matter where I am, I am required to LIVE the Christian life, not just play it or talk about it. I am challenged to take what I know and LIVE it! To take God's Word more seriously; To love the unlovely; to overlook the offense; to forgive whether someone deserves to be forgiven or not; to give grace!<br /><br />I will close with this song that is running through my mind: Change my heart O God, make it ever true; Change my heart O God, may I be like you...</span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-35933589766142200802007-09-07T10:47:00.000-04:002007-09-07T11:16:44.769-04:00On Vacation<span style="font-family: verdana; color: rgb(153, 51, 153);font-size:130%;" >I am currently in Illinois visiting my friend (Toknowhim). I am by myself so I am getting lots of work done (I brought stuff to work on while she is a t work. <br /><br />It is funny, but when my friend moved to Illinois over 3 years ago she met a lady at her church who had an older son with Asperger's Syndrome, which is what my son has. I had contacted her about 3 years ago and she has been a wonderful mentor to me. It's neat how you can connect so easily to a perfect stranger when you have so much in common.<br /><br />Well, last night I had an opportunity to meet with her and once again, she was a great source of encouragement to me. I am so grateful for her and the blessing she has been to me. She is walking a path that I am currently on, but she is way ahead of me. It is such a blessing to have her to share the things she is currently learning and to share the mistakes to avoid. Thank you Becky, for the godly example that you set before me!<br /><br />Today, my friend and I leave to go to Nashville, TN (A 6 hour drive) to go to a women's conference. We are so excited. We get to see Beth Moore, Priscilla Shire, and Kay Arthur. Worship will be led by Travis Cotrell and Anthony Evans. It doesn't get much better than that. Great speakers, great worship, and a great friend. I am grateful for this opportunity to get away as life has been very busy for us. It has been good to get some work done too, that I have not had a chance to do.<br /><br />I am sure my friend will post something about our trip when she gets back, and probably have some pictures too. You can go check out her blog from the side bar (Toknowhim). If you go there now, you can read a post that I wrote about her while she was at work, titled, "A teasured Friend".<br /><br />~Blessings,<br /> Christina<br /><br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-60813165082490523572007-09-03T09:15:00.001-04:002007-09-03T13:08:32.383-04:00Joy In The Journey<span style=";font-family:arial;font-size:130%;" >Can I just start out by saying that GOD IS GOOD!?!? That may not be a surprise to anyone reading this, but my heart rejoices in Him today even through hurt and disappointment. The past few weeks have brought on some very discouraging circumstances. This process that we are going through is THE most difficult time we have had as a family, yet because of where are hearts are at with the Lord, it does not feel as overwhelming as the less trying times in the past. I hope that makes sense. As God turns up the fire in the refining process, we are are learning to withstand the heat. We have so much hope because of all the ways we have seen Him work through our lives in the past. There has not been a difficult time that we have experienced in the past that has brought on so much joy. Disappointments as well, but because the Lord is teaching us HOW to deal with disappointment, He is turning them to joy.<br /><br />Several things have happened in the last couple of weeks that caused a friend of mine to say, "Christina, I think God is trying to teach you something here." The same type of frustrating thing happened 3 times in a week. Then 2 weeks later, a few other events happened that were tough and we once again had to learn to keep our focus on Christ and not be tempted to take Him off the throne. Which I regret to say that I think I was sitting on the throne for about a week before I realized it. God has been teaching us an amazing lesson of how our sin keeps us from walking in fellowship with Him and hearing His voice in our lives. Like in the previous posts, I talked about how our focus needs to be on Him and sowing to the Spirit instead of trying harder. God has made it so clear to me that instead of trying harder, so I can have the power of the Holy Spirit in my life, that I need to break down that brick wall of sin that keeps the Spirit from working. So the past couple of months, as a family, we have been learning to confess our sin to each other rather than justify our attitudes and disappointments. This is so humbling, and it brings so much freedom to our hearts once we've gotten to the place where we can truly put Christ on the throne. God is teaching me how I cannot just SAY I want Him on the throne, when my heart is not in the right place. He is showing me that my heart is what needs to be pure, not my actions ~ and THAT is what is going to release the Spirit's power in my life.<br /><br />We are making it a priority to learn from every frustration and disappointment that comes our way. It seems God is purging our hearts from so much pride and self reliance. The other night, for the first time as a couple, we literally got on our knees and prayed for about an hour together. We did this because we have come to a place where we realize how desperate we are to be intimate with the Lord, lest we accidentally go down a path He has not called us to go down. We realized in the past couple of weeks that our faith has been weak, and we have not been trusting God enough. If we trust Him to guide our path, then we had better be on our knees asking Him to show us that path. Then when HE reveals the path, we can walk in faith and confidence. We will make many mistakes along our way, and probably travel down the wrong path more times than we'd like to admit, but when these disappointments and frustrations come, we need to see that as the Lord opposing our path, and showing us a different one. Some of these disappointments have happened when we were on the right path (because God's intention was for us to learn through them), but when we allow the disappointments to keep us down, we have learned nothing. We are learning that God is so much more in control than we ever gave Him credit for.<br /><br />I will end with a couple of really neat miracles that the Lord has done through our son David. When we first started this journey, David was very angry and could not believe God could change his heart about moving to Arkansas. I believe there is an earlier post about his feelings about all of it. And the reason I posted those things is because we were so confident we were walking down the path God has called us, that we knew God would eventually change David's heart. We just didn't know if that would be on the front end of moving or the back end. But either way, we knew that God would not call us down a path that my son could not handle.<br /><br />Last week, I spoke to someone on the phone that expressed some concerns she had heard from others about our move (about how this would affect David). When I got off the phone I asked David, "David, there are some people that are concerned about you in this move to Arkansas. What do you think about that?" He said, "Oh mommy, I think it is wonderful that you and daddy are going to work for FamilyLife. You are going to help other people in their marriages and families." (I smiled) and continued, "Yes, but how will that affect YOU?" He said, "Mommy, if God has called us to go than we HAVE to go!" (I smiled again) and continued, "Yes, But how does that make YOU FEEL?" He said, "Mommy, at first I was angry, but God has changed my heart. I was worried that I would not have friends, and God has already provided friends." I am so proud of my son that he is adopting the legacy of faith that we so desperately want all our children to have ~ a faith that prayerfully someday will surpass ours.<br /><br />This morning, I was talking to my dad about some things that David overheard. It was concerning our support. When I got off the phone, David realized by the conversation what we were talking about. Without going into details, we have to backtrack our percentage (for now) about 20%. Now that's a bummer! Before today, we were 45% funded. Now we are 25%. David said, "Mommy, how faithful are you that we are supposed to do this?" I said, "100%." He said, "Than you can handle more of a loss than that!" Oh how I pray that some adults can have as much faith as this precious 12 year old boy! Man, has he stretched mine!<br /><br />So even in the midst of yet more disappointments, we praise a holy God who is in control and gives us great joy as we put all our trust in Him.<br /><br />~To the one who is able to do exceedingly and abundantly more than we can ask or imagine......<br /></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-71782354130337492952007-08-21T11:40:00.001-04:002007-08-22T08:43:22.236-04:00Missing The Mark - Part 2<span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >I have received permission from my friend to disclose any personal information she has shared with me. I will give you a little background of the conversations we were having, before I post the e-mail. Over the years we have discussed our struggles with people pleasing, trying to "Obey God" in our own strength, insecurity, judging others, etc. etc. The list can go on. We share everything. Often times we say, if anyone knew this stuff about us, they would think we were awful. We often times confess the motives of our hearts as to why we do the things we do - if we are even aware of those motives. We challenge each other to dig deeper into our hearts to search the things that God sees, and not just what WE WANT to see. The bible says in Jeremiah 17:9<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >"The heart is deceitful above all things<br />and beyond cure.<br />Who can understand it?"<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;"><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" >So we have come to a place where we understand that we would be foolish if we thought we knew the motives behind our actions. The Bible is pretty clear here that the heart is deceitful and beyond cure. We understand that ONLY God understands the heart, so we fully trust that HE and only HE will reveal our sin to us - not others view of sin. We will use God's Word as the standard for revealing our sin and not others standards. We know this to be true and yet we still struggle with comparing ourselves to others (whether in a good way OR a bad way). That is a whole other journey the Lord has taken me on and has revealed many scriptures that have pierced my heart, but I do not want to stray too far off the topic of this post.<br /><br />One particular day my friend called me to confess a sin she felt toward a friend. She confessed of her jealousy over something her friend was blessed with that she could not have. She confessed of the evil thoughts that she had toward her friend. She asked me why I thought it is so easy for our minds to go so astray and think such evil thoughts. I can tell this was really bothering her. Several days prior to this conversation, I had been thinking a lot about sin and my wheels were turning. I was really seeking and praying for God to shed His light on the truth of all this. The next morning I woke up with a flood of thoughts, and when that happens, I know it is God and typically I will journal those thoughts. I do not have anything worthy of writing unless I feel the Lord pressing something on my heart. My journals pretty much consist of writings of when I am extremely frustrated about something, or it is something the Lord had revealed to me - otherwise I feel I have nothing in me. So this particular morning, since the revelation had to do with my friends question, I decided to turn my journal entry into an e-mail to her and then print it out and staple it in my journal. This is the e-mail/journal entry from <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><br /><br />April 18, 2007:</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">"The Lord has brought me to a new level of realization of my sin this morning (and I know it is only the tip of the iceberg). After thinking a little about what sin is and talking a little about it with (friends) last night, my mind was really challenged. I asked (friend) what he thought the definition of sin was, and he said he heard it once said, "Anything that falls short of the holiness of God". That's exactly what I was thinking. SO then if that is our definition, why do we categorize sin the way we do? Just like you felt yesterday about the evil thoughts you had about your friend, and how you were beating yourself up over it. Why do we beat ourselves up over that, but not about witnessing to someone when given the opportunity, or not praying, or reading the Bible, or maybe even just missing an opportunity to serve someone.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">I checked out the definition of sin this morning in the Greek. Do you know what it is? It says, "Missing the mark (and so not share in the prize)." You know what that means? It means ANYTHING short of perfection is sin.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">I had this awareness of my sin and it brought me to tears while I was praying. I just saw the pride of my past (and my present), to think that I'm not as sinful as I am.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">I was thinking about your situation that we talked about yesterday with your friend and why we feel the guilt over stuff like that, and this is what came to mind: Satan wants us to feel guilt over those types of sins because he wants us to BELIEVE we are acting holy when we are not having those thoughts - when in actuality, there is NO part of the day that we are holy, not even if we are in church with our hands lifted high and singing in awe of God - we still miss the mark even then. I talked to Dave about it this morning and his first thought was that we're not ALWAYS sinning, like those times when we are worshiping, but I disagreed. I asked him if at that time of worship, is he loving the Lord with ALL his heart (and that love means loving others as well - love is patient, kind, not self-seeking, not boastful, keeps no record of wrong, etc.). In our flesh, even in those times when we are worshiping and serving, our hearts are still not holy, therefore we have missed the mark, and are sinful.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">This verse came to mind:</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">Romans 12:3</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">"For by the grace given to me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you."<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">This verse came to mind months ago, and I knew there was so much more to it than I was seeing. Today, those words jump off the page to me. I see how I have thought more highly of myself than I ought. In relation to the situations like we talked about yesterday (wanting bad things for others), ,we think of ourselves too highly when we think THAT is more sinful than anything else we do. We say sin is sin to God, but we live and feel and act differently. If we had an understanding that just standing there doing nothing (even without any thoughts in our mind) is sinful, because at that moment we still fall short of the glory (holiness) of God.<br /><br />Check out the surrounding verses:<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">Romans 12:2-5</span><br /></span></span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);" id="en-NIV-28233" class="sup"></span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. </span></span><p style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);font-family:georgia;"><span style="font-size:130%;"> <span id="en-NIV-28234" class="sup">3</span>For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. <span id="en-NIV-28235" class="sup">4</span>Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, <span id="en-NIV-28236" class="sup">5</span>so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.</span></p><p style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);font-family:georgia;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">God has given us a measure of grace (exactly what that means I do not know, but I understand in part), and I realized once again that it is only His Spirit that reveals truth. When our minds are transformed into the likeness of Christ, and not our opinions, then we will be able to understand God's will. When we understand God's will and His grace, we will not think of ourselves so highly, and understand the sinful flesh we are in. In accordance to the faith that we have at this moment, we need to sow into the Spirit and learn more. This just confirms to me how much we need to just press into God, and stop trying so hard to attain some level of holiness. We will never reach it. God brought to mind the verse in Galatians that says, <span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">"It is no longer I that lives, but Christ who lives in me." (Gal. 2:20). <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">It was brought home a little more today than usual. It showed me how much of ME tries to live out this walk instead of Christ through me. When I recognize HOW sinful I am, I realize no matter how much effort I put forth, I will always fall short. So there is only one solution - and it is not to feel guilt - but to recognize that that is why Christ died, and if I just humble myself before Him, and sow into the Spirit, He will work through me - I cannot attain holiness in my own effort. This verse just came to mind:</span></span></span></span></p><p style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);font-family:georgia;"><span style="font-size:130%;">Galatians 3:2-5<br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"></span></span></span></span></p><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);" id="en-NIV-29089" class="sup">2</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">I would like to learn just one thing from you: Did you receive the Spirit by observing the law, or by believing what you heard? </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);" id="en-NIV-29090" class="sup">3</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort? </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);" id="en-NIV-29091" class="sup">4</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">Have you suffered so much for nothing—if it really was for nothing? </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);" id="en-NIV-29092" class="sup">5</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">Does God give you his Spirit and work miracles among you because you observe the law, or because you believe what you heard?<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">I feel so humbled today - and yet I just know based on past experiences how prideful I actually still am. : ) God is so good, and I am grateful for His Word!"<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Well, that ended my e-mail to my friend. As I re-type all those words again, I feel yet humbled some more, and I say again, I know I have so far to go. I want to explain, that although I know it is Christ THROUGH me that completes the work He has called me to do, I began to wonder WHY I felt the conviction to perform so much. I would read the Word and feel convicted that I was NOT living up to holiness, but felt powerless to perform the Lord's commands. The Lord reminded me once again of His precious Word.</span><br /></span></span></span><p style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);font-family:georgia;"><span style="font-size:130%;">Galatians 3:24<br /></span></p><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;" ><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);" id="en-NIV-29111" class="sup">24</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">So the law was put in charge to lead us to Christ</span><sup style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);"></sup><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);"> that we might be justified by faith. </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);" id="en-NIV-29112" class="sup">25</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);">Now that faith has come, we are no longer under the supervision of the law.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I realized that God's laws are good, and He meant for us to follow them, but He never meant for them to put guilt on us. He never meant for us to perform them in our own strength. He gave them to us to show us HOW far we fall short, so we can see how desperate we need to be for His power to work through us to complete them. Trusting in God does not mean ignoring our sin, nor does it mean to strive harder. It means to submit to His authority and confess every area where we fall short and desperately desire the power that He so graciously gives to every one who accepts Him as Savior and Lord. When I have fallen short of God's glory, I realize that I need His power in me. When others fall short, it is that same power that THEY need. We are so foolish when we judge others for their lack of performance, or judge ourselves for OUR lacking; as if there was anything in our own power that will get us to reach the holiness of God.<br /><br />My failures are so clearly before me, and as I sit at the throne of grace, I know God in His infinite wisdom and perfect timing, will empower me to perform every task He has called me to do - but He will not empower me until I humble myself and confess my sin. When we see ourselves in light of a holy God, we will not see others sin as the log, but our own. Then, and only then, can we truly see others the way Christ sees them, and love others the way Christ loves them. I am making a habit of confessing every known sin and making a choice to take myself off the throne of my heart, and place Christ back in His rightful place.<br /><br />I desperately desire to know God and His will for my life, so I will do what His Word says, and seek first His Kingdom, and His righteousness. I continue to pray that the Lord will reveal the thoughts and attitudes of my heart, and I know it would be in my best interest to confess and repent and not try to act like I have it all together. I am SO far from having it all together. This is such an incredible journey and I am eternally grateful for every thing the Lord has allowed to come into my path to teach me who He really is.<br /><br /></span></span></span><div style="text-align: center;font-family:georgia;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 255, 51);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">~~Trusting that He is who He says He is, and that He will do what He says He will do~~<br /><br /><br /></span></span></span></div><br /></div><div class="publisher-info-inset"> </div> </div>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-10197137265840769792007-08-20T16:18:00.000-04:002007-08-20T17:06:44.860-04:00Missing the Mark - Part 1<span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" ><em>“God is doing an indescribable work in my heart. When I look back, this revival in my life actually began 19 months ago, sped up last fall and then went into overdrive at the beginning of this year. I have been a Christian for 34 years and yet this is by far the most intense season of grace I have ever encountered. It feels more like a born again experience than when I was saved at the age of ten. That is the reason I have decided to get rebaptized in the Jordan River tomorrow. I’m sure I will eventually write more details sometime in the future but part of the work God is doing is revealing my sin of self-suffiency and self-protection. I have lived much of my life attempting to gain as much knowledge as possible, so I would make the right choices, in order to stay in control, so I could protect myself from getting hurt. In essence, I have desired to be my own god, rather than trust God with my wounded heart. Now, nobody would have seen this on the outside. I didn’t even recognize it in myself until recently.”</em> <a href="http://www.lisawhelchel.com/journal/images/rebaptizedjordanriver_bg.html" onclick="window.open('http://www.lisawhelchel.com/journal/images/rebaptizedjordanriver_bg.html','popup','width=400,height=335,scrollbars=no,resizable=no,toolbar=no,directories=no,location=no,menubar=no,status=no,left=0,top=0'); return false"><br /></a></span> <p style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-family:trebuchet ms;"> <span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" > "I am learning so much about the freedom to really enter into the rest of God by grace rather than striving to earn God’s love and approval through the law. "</span></p><p style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:130%;" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;">I copied this from Lisa Welchel's (you know....Blair from the facts of life) journal. I know you were thinking......"you have been a Christian for 34 years???????" I know I am only 33. And I suppose you knew that I was not getting baptized in the Jordan River tomorrow. : ) So as you can see, I did not write that.....however, it captured so much of what I have been feeling, and I too have felt that God is stripping me of my old way of thinking and transforming my mind. It is amazing how much more sinful I see myself now, than I did when I was not so close to God.<br /></span></p><span style=";font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" >I was looking back in my journal to find an e-mail that was sent to my friend about this very topic. I had woken up one morning to a new level of realization of my sin, and I felt overwhelmed by it, and e-mailed my friend to share it with her. I will not share the e-mail, but one thing that I shared with her, was that I looked up the definition of sin, and it really pierced my heart. It is "missing the mark (and so not share in the prize)". You know what that means? It means ANYTHING short of perfection is sin. I continued to tell her how I had this awareness of my sin and it brought me to tears while I was praying. I just saw the pride of my past (and my present), to think that I am not as sinful as I am.<br /><br />I wish I could share the whole e-mail with you but I cannot betray a friend's confidence. If she gives me permission than I will. I would love to write more, but I will wait to see if I have permission to share more. If I do not, than I will try to make the rest make sense.<br /></span><p style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:130%;">....Trusting the Lord to complete the work He has started in me...<br /><br /></span></p><p style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:130%;">~~Christina<br /></span></p><p style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" ></span><br /></p>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-36658640800792638112007-08-10T17:37:00.000-04:002007-08-11T12:14:13.165-04:00Answer to a friends comment<span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">My friend "Toknowhim" commented on the "Worship - part 2" post, to explain about the mountain top analogy the Lord gave me awhile ago. It is difficult for me to post JUST this analogy without giving the details of how I got to that point, but I will try. : ) Several years ago, when I really began my intimate journey with the Lord, He began to reveal himself to me in a way that overwhelmed me - in a good way. In the past I was very critical and had very high expectations, not only for others, but myself as well. I thought it was good to have those expectations. I felt I had discernment and could see clear into certain situations. The very first scripture that I can remember the Lord waking me up to (back in 1999) was Romans 12:2</span><span id="en-NIV-28233" class="sup" style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> "</span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." Now back in my legalistic state, I obsessed over HOW I was conforming. If God could just reveal it to me, I would change. Well, it wasn't that easy. He began to take me on a journey that truly</span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" > renewed</span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> the way I think. A journey that revealed the sin in my heart that </span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >resulted</span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> in sin, as opposed to just working on the sin. You see, if I just stopped the sin on the outside, my heart would not have changed. (Oh I am SO tempted to go off that topic and explain that - my journals have years of stuff on that alone). OK, back on track - so one of the first bible verses that I read that literally jumped off the page to me were in Romans</span><span id="en-NIV-28211" class="sup" style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"> 11. The whole chapter really, but I will highlight verse 6 <span style="font-style: italic;">"</span></span><span style="font-style: italic;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >If the part of the dough offered as firstfruits is holy, then the whole batch is holy; if the root is holy, so are the branches." </span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">I cannot explain what happened in my heart that day - I was amazed that the Word of God came alive to me and showed me how the root is my </span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:trebuchet ms;" >heart </span><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">and the branches are my works. See, I was so focused on my works, but I needed to be focused on my heart. OK, so now I understood this concept in my head, but it took years to transfer to my heart. I also had much opposition to face from leaders, teachers and friends who felt I was not being biblical for focusing so much on the love relationship and not on obedience. It was so fresh and new to me but I was CONFIDENT of what God showed me. SO I think because I was being opposed by others, and seeing clearly that they were not getting it either, there was a spiritual pride that came over me. I had no clue at that time of how far I needed to go, I just knew I was not in the right place.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">So as time went on over the years, the Lord would of course humble me, and then reveal Himself again-in a new way. I often felt so alone on this journey because I felt like no one understood me. I actually remember one day thinking to myself, "life is pretty good right now, I feel like I have things pretty much together" Oh, I had so much to learn. Of course the process was always the same - I felt pride with every new revelation, and then the Lord continued to humble me. One day in my quiet time, I had a very specific vision so to speak of two people . I felt SO burdened and thought, "God, if you are teaching me to love others and not see their flaws, and not be critical, then why are you allowing me to see this?" His answer was so clear AND overwhelming. He revealed how He Had indeed given me a gift of discernment, but what He intended for good, I abused. What God intended was for me to pray for others and share truth in a loving way, but I used the knowledge as judgement. It took me so many years to work through this process. One big obstacle I had, was I had so much false doctrine in my head that had to be purified by the truth of God's Word. I still could not let go of the whole works salvation - I still put so much attention on performance instead of the heart.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">So I had a season of my life where I felt like the Lord clearly told me that I needed to take a step back from ALL ministry and that we were going to go on a "humbling" journey. Of course at the beginning of all that I wanted God to just tell me the areas I was being prideful in, but He had to SHOW me; He had to TEACH me. Oh, it is so painful - but what a genuine love I have for Him and others. </span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">During this whole humbling process, I began to see that the closer I grew to Christ, the further I had to go to be like Him. I thought as I was growing, I saw myself getting closer, but when God humbled me I saw how much further I had to go. He is so gracious, and I love that He is sovereign, and His ways are perfect. I can trust in that now - without so many questions.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">So to the mountain top analogy. During this process, my eyes began to open and the Lord gave me a picture of myself on the top of a mountain (during those sweet times when He revealed Himself to me), but He didn't forget to remind me that that was clearly NOT the top! He now allows me to enjoy the mountain top experience, but with great humility, I know that in His sovereign time, He will show me the top. Back in March 2006, this is a part of my journal entry:</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(204, 51, 204);font-family:trebuchet ms;" >"I can't even express the freedom I feel in my heart. I feel like I've climbed a mile high mountain and endured the pain and suffering to get to the top and what a thrill it is to get there. BUT my pride has been broken TOO many times to know this is NOT the top. But God lets me feel like it is and lets me enjoy the moment and I only see below, but in due time, I will look up again, and His mighty hand will sweep across and move those clouds that were in my view and allow me to once again see that I am CLEARLY not at the top."<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I am confident that during this journey I have hurt others with my pride. I wish I could personally repent to each one, if I only knew who each one was. Often times it is difficult to let go of past hurts, and I would not want to be responsible for someones broken fellowship with God because of my sin. I pray if that is the case with anyone, that the Lord will put it on their hearts to tell me. I will readily repent. There are some, that as I type, that I already know I have hurt that I need to go to.<br /><br />God is so good, and worthy of the hardships we have to go through to truly bring Him glory with our purified lives. I know we will not be sanctified until heaven, but I pray I remember to keep short accounts of sin - repent each moment I sin - and bring Him glory in my journey.<br /><br />Praising Jesus for His loving kindness, grace, and forgiveness........<br /></span></span></span><span style="font-style: italic;"></span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-63303180878684999042007-08-06T23:50:00.001-04:002008-12-10T04:07:42.287-05:00First Support Goal Trip<span style="font-size:130%;">As something to look forward to, we told our boys that when we hit certain goals in our support, we would do something fun as a family. This past weekend, we celebrated our first goal. We took a family trip to my brothers home in Alabama. The boys had SO much fun. They all got to ride jet skis, go tubing, and go 4 wheeling through trails in the woods. We even played Hide and Go Seek on 4 wheelers! It was SO fun! There were two mishaps over the weekend. My 2 year old niece got second degree burns on her foot by stepping on a VERY hot piece of metal in front of the fire place. She did not skip a beat though. She was so good and happy even though her little feet were all bandaged up. The second thing was that David was SO excited that he learned how to ride a 4 wheeler ALL BY HIMSELF, so I followed him on another quad around the lake. He did great! He wanted to go again, so I asked my sister Gina if she could follow him this time. As I went in the house to wash my hands, and I look out the window and I just said, "UH- OH" You have to keep in mind that my mom was worried about EVERYTHING and EVERY safety issue you can imagine. She obsessed over life jackets, and helmets, and you name it, she worried about it. So my sister Nicole asks if this is an "Emergency UH-OH" and I look at my mom and she is looking right at me so I shake my head no and then quickly YES - I think this is tragic! I looked out the window and I see David IN THE LAKE. It actually was quite funny. I don't know how he managed it, but he drove the quad right into the lake. We came in and told my mom that I guess she would make a new rule that you not only had to wear helmets on the quads, but life jackets as well! : )<br /><br /></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiacoG7TySiToTC71SpKWFqkLVcETQxctM32SoLAPhuQKTuSWY2-H1EWLOZDh24oeDUQW7f6wVubdotSBMv2Yy8YYz7Fhn22YFsF69H1acaUnVBbFezS1RZa2PN961Ir5JYQi9C-Byi9Q/s1600-h/101_0284.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiacoG7TySiToTC71SpKWFqkLVcETQxctM32SoLAPhuQKTuSWY2-H1EWLOZDh24oeDUQW7f6wVubdotSBMv2Yy8YYz7Fhn22YFsF69H1acaUnVBbFezS1RZa2PN961Ir5JYQi9C-Byi9Q/s320/101_0284.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095810270774928642" border="0" /></a> Samuel, me & Jonathan. When I was riding just me & Samuel, he<br />looked back several times with great excitement and said, "Mommy this<br />feels like a DREEEEAAAM! But it's not, right mommy?"<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhObZmJEjTReac0OJyuuxRKOugxf3y4jUeeVZjIPyEAXphWet6WYLej-Gro5JSFhdHyf1NdYHsoinwDEZKJP7DvmNshOFKdvHYxnAvcNaWdJnaLRW4CdDYnj5p3qnxK9ol6ydRsoIiQH3M/s1600-h/101_0290.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhObZmJEjTReac0OJyuuxRKOugxf3y4jUeeVZjIPyEAXphWet6WYLej-Gro5JSFhdHyf1NdYHsoinwDEZKJP7DvmNshOFKdvHYxnAvcNaWdJnaLRW4CdDYnj5p3qnxK9ol6ydRsoIiQH3M/s320/101_0290.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095810124746040562" border="0" /></a>Jonathan learned to ride the Jet Ski by himself. He was SO excited.<br />He just gave us a big grin every time he passed.<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQqD6IU9i1weZWt1hDvmuKzQnmDwWlATQ7xYhFcXJHjVYLn-Vr1NngzZc6QS6bBurB6yYmnuuDs0VElyByhbLZBywl2i_01BUYNPCrRC1sShAF4OQhKsBhE2hSipWYUMWwsy0P6MKiCmk/s1600-h/101_0273.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQqD6IU9i1weZWt1hDvmuKzQnmDwWlATQ7xYhFcXJHjVYLn-Vr1NngzZc6QS6bBurB6yYmnuuDs0VElyByhbLZBywl2i_01BUYNPCrRC1sShAF4OQhKsBhE2hSipWYUMWwsy0P6MKiCmk/s320/101_0273.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095809669479507154" border="0" /></a>Dave, David, Samuel, & My niece Toni-Leigh<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpnX-RfBCtNM3Jc6QwirRS-Fd3MQvzeDeipTI11lpatI8ir40vLZYm14sYC5EYfq8U4PKpP2QrLdI-f2EnG057TdD0nkCXfMr7lcPDYO1yUQaqdiPUDQTZ2sDiPtZMFnHlBWHuwAzBGbQ/s1600-h/101_0267.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpnX-RfBCtNM3Jc6QwirRS-Fd3MQvzeDeipTI11lpatI8ir40vLZYm14sYC5EYfq8U4PKpP2QrLdI-f2EnG057TdD0nkCXfMr7lcPDYO1yUQaqdiPUDQTZ2sDiPtZMFnHlBWHuwAzBGbQ/s320/101_0267.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095809394601600194" border="0" /></a>My brother-in-law Ron gave everyone tube rides. That was SO fun!<br /><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCcct6JgzVT5GBj-yylGuIvUwh5VnxpUnYDhdRlq_aLDtF4yBsZEg_G5wUUKbb-kMWZwbJRQ-SpLdQAwiwV3l6Af1sHnueNQFO4En8bvNGmkXwnp5wkttD0jyPn1cU-pb4-aoyPeJme2Q/s1600-h/101_0257.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCcct6JgzVT5GBj-yylGuIvUwh5VnxpUnYDhdRlq_aLDtF4yBsZEg_G5wUUKbb-kMWZwbJRQ-SpLdQAwiwV3l6Af1sHnueNQFO4En8bvNGmkXwnp5wkttD0jyPn1cU-pb4-aoyPeJme2Q/s320/101_0257.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095809184148202674" border="0" /></a>Samuel<br /><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3t9e_HwEhlLPCEnzeHGb9YQJvAAHuSxKrtIqtqq1r6tchYOjefF2GN6UO9DgQ5Nf7YrHTWQZ4KEIUBPyGziiuv2AcvUvHtu1sujI37l0aHWD4vsyfHgvzDC808DcMLqNADLtaOKlB2zk/s1600-h/101_0254.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3t9e_HwEhlLPCEnzeHGb9YQJvAAHuSxKrtIqtqq1r6tchYOjefF2GN6UO9DgQ5Nf7YrHTWQZ4KEIUBPyGziiuv2AcvUvHtu1sujI37l0aHWD4vsyfHgvzDC808DcMLqNADLtaOKlB2zk/s320/101_0254.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095809042414281890" border="0" /></a>David<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiybjUhqmnsABxhDw__tYabvtJuZgGMJGdxGtU8gh6cSpMwHxVWbwqSsw-ChxfSjbwBDOWREEev34tRAWoYRAkzyiwj6Edvqg1PGOWw9KdpERdZdujk-zdO3M9WhmnJvXqTZx_MVcxiyq4/s1600-h/101_0264.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiybjUhqmnsABxhDw__tYabvtJuZgGMJGdxGtU8gh6cSpMwHxVWbwqSsw-ChxfSjbwBDOWREEev34tRAWoYRAkzyiwj6Edvqg1PGOWw9KdpERdZdujk-zdO3M9WhmnJvXqTZx_MVcxiyq4/s320/101_0264.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095808866320622738" border="0" /></a>Jonathan<br /><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFYQtE0HMk0oLJUIXAhcQaCy8xiEqbcH5uaw0TWDWAfPhlmyif-rFW4HR9Zcyri9cyaZCRPOtXqoCvE6saSzOOVtUIrLvscDejZwcTNXzXXc3C-T7CfHX4QDs_fFWHzZ0f7nI9i-ntnlw/s1600-h/101_0260.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFYQtE0HMk0oLJUIXAhcQaCy8xiEqbcH5uaw0TWDWAfPhlmyif-rFW4HR9Zcyri9cyaZCRPOtXqoCvE6saSzOOVtUIrLvscDejZwcTNXzXXc3C-T7CfHX4QDs_fFWHzZ0f7nI9i-ntnlw/s320/101_0260.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095808587147748482" border="0" /></a>My sweet sisters, Nicole & Maria, my niece Stephanie, My niece<br />Adrianna and her dog Hunter. Jonathan up front, my nephew<br />Anthony to the right and my niece Toni-Leigh on the jet ski.<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYp2rYBHd8thzEd_fM5ZrYES_aaQO7VbTsxdwwZ1zLiqS0nKwAYqB0UYJWiEkOnPC51up0BhQNEQuOOSREn89LQfkFeo0C9-w3f6vQhEkna71a0fKkuOYYmGqSeE0Xp-jfass9EcCUdzQ/s1600-h/101_0274.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYp2rYBHd8thzEd_fM5ZrYES_aaQO7VbTsxdwwZ1zLiqS0nKwAYqB0UYJWiEkOnPC51up0BhQNEQuOOSREn89LQfkFeo0C9-w3f6vQhEkna71a0fKkuOYYmGqSeE0Xp-jfass9EcCUdzQ/s320/101_0274.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5095807255707886706" border="0" /></a>Jonathan riding the quad ALL BY HIMSELF.<br />Thankfully he stayed out of the lake. : )<br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-size:130%;">We have our next goal trip planned, we just don't know when we will reach that goal. This gives the boys something to look forward to. I think they are each excited in their own way about what the Lord is doing, and I know they are blessed with every new supporter. It is such a joy to share with them how God's people are so faithful. We can see their faith grow right along side ours. David actually told me some things the other day that he was LOOKING FORWARD TO about our move. The presence of God is so apparent in this whole process, we just rejoice with every passing day. God is so good and we are thankful for this time away with our family. It was much needed!</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></div>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3424583698409222764.post-41306385642591856602007-08-06T10:12:00.000-04:002007-08-06T12:24:48.721-04:00True Worship - part 2My mind has been spinning in so many directions the last couple of weeks, that I don't know where to begin. Even more since the last "True worship" post. So I will just add to the last one and go from there.<br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;font-size:130%;" >I had asked for you to read those statements from John Piper and think about what thoughts came to mind when reading those particular verses, because when I read them, I definitely had a reaction. Years ago, I felt I was falling very short from living the joyful, abundant life that God had promised in His Word. I did not feel like I was living much different from the rest of the world. I knew I should be obedient, and I tried so hard to obey the commands I knew. One very evident command for believers is what we call "The great Commission." This command is to go and make disciples of all nations. Yet it is the command that is most neglected among believers. I became very involved with the evangelism program at our church, but something in my heart was not right. I felt I was acting out of a sense of "duty" as opposed to joy. The Lord brought to mind an analogy of a salesperson. If I were a salesperson selling a particular product, how effective would I be if I did not believe in the product I was selling? By no means am I (or was God) comparing a relationship with Jesus to any product, but the point was that I was not experiencing Jesus in a way that made me excited to share Him. When Dave goes out to sell kitchens, he MUST believe in the product he is selling. There have been lots of ups and downs in his job, and I have frequently asked him how he stays motivated to sell during those frustrating times. His answer is always the same, "Because I believe that Cornerstone is the best cabinet company out there. I believe they will do the best job." I asked him how he would do it if he didn't believe that. He simply said he couldn't. So I ask myself the same question. What is motivating me to share Jesus? Is He not worth sharing? I knew He was, but in my heart, I obviously did not feel that way.<br /><br />At that time several years ago, I was not enjoying God's Word either. I would read things like, "Your love is better than life" and yet I did not feel that. The bible says God's Word is LIVING and ACTIVE, yet I was not experiencing that. What I WAS experiencing was a conviction that I was not living up to His word. I love how Paul says that Jesus came to fulfill the law, but we are not exempt from it. He asks the question, "So what was the purpose of the law?" It was to lead us to Christ. (Gal. 3) The law shows us our inadequacy. Having the law shows us how we fall short of the holiness of God. My problem was that I tried to obey the law, instead of the power of the Holy Spirit in me to obey the law. I just didn't know how to access that power, even though I knew that power was in me. The bible says, "You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you". (Acts 1:8) I knew I had asked Jesus into my heart, but I felt powerless to obey His commands.<br /><br />I will add more at another time, but I will end with this: Those quotes from John Piper really stirred my soul. Maybe some Christians will read that and think it is extreme, or they think they cannot love God that way. Or they feel that intimacy with Christ is not supposed to be that real. Oh how I ache for those believers who miss the abundant life that God has promised for each of us. God has revealed Himself to me so much over the past several years that I have been accused of being over zealous. And at times I have been - not that you can really be too zealous for God, but it was more of a zealousness for the truth. I was on a mission to have a relationship that I knew God promised in His Word, yet I did not see it being lived out around me. So I think that zealousness came out in a way that was critical of the believer, because I knew people weren't getting it. I wasn't getting it either. As my eyes opened to the truth, I thought I WAS getting it. Unfortunately, every time I had this so called mountain top experience, God would move the clouds away from my eyes and show me where the mountain top really was. I am learning to enjoy those so called mountain top experiences, but still knowing that I have SO far to go.<br /><br />When I read God's Word now, I truly love it. I can honestly say His love is better than life. I feel affection for Him in my heart, even on the bad days. What a process it has been to get to that point, and yet I truly see how far I have to go. That love I have for Him now, has nothing to do with maturity on my part, or any thing I have done, but just learning to trust and believe Him for who He says He is, and surrendering my will to Him. Next post, I will talk about that word "Surrender." What a process that continues to be.....<br /><br />Pursue His heart. He promises that if you seek Him with all your heart, you WILL find Him.....</span>The Cooke Familyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07391267556174395655noreply@blogger.com3